Psssst . . . . . . . . the secret ingredient is despair.

Jesus Christ. Sally Jesse Raphael has really let herself go to hell.

Not removed from Costco for yelling at Schultz?

Snow? No - it's STOW, as in "I'm trying to take you to the..."

Say what you will about Backman's filthy mouth, he won't be the worst manager in the history of the Peanuts unless and until his shortstop goes on strike for more dog food.

If the shockingly graphic anecdotes I coaxed out of a panties-shittingly wasted Julie Andrews are to be believed, this is not the most alarming sexual behavior to be displayed by a Plummer.

The pictures can be found in a file cabinet labeled "Evidence" and located in the Rick Santorum Senatorial Archives.

You call that a James Brown mugshot? Sheeeeeeeit, THIS is a James Brown Mugshot.

"One thing is certain... Yeardley Love is dead... murdered, and somebody's responsible!"

Meanwhile, Jermaine Stewart was imploring people to remain clothed . . . . . . from the grave.

If the Cavs somehow defeat Washington tomorrow night, their record will be 19-63 and they will then become the biggest national tragedy ever associated with those two numbers.

Know who else would have traded Five Guys for a Wafer? Karen Carpenter.

Jesus

+1

Meanwhile Marge Schott continues C*nt's Decomposition.

Davies' co-passenger has been doing the "Weekend at Bernie's" for quite some time now.

Jesus, is there anything the French won't concede?

Grittiest.

I knew it was only a matter of time before someone would risotto this type of humor.

"$22,320 in handball related expenses? Bah, that's nothing!" - Irish national soccer team, 2009