This summer, for the first time in my 35 years, I wore a sleeveless dress because, fuck it, it was hot. At first I was twitchy, then I shrugged and reveled in the fact that I had finally, FINALLY come to terms with the fact that I might accidentally take someone out if they're standing too close when I wave. Now, I…

Oh, I hope these aren’t some sort of hoax. Please let there be a cool story behind these...

Firetruck rushing by just as I took the pic. He also looks like that when the vet takes his temperature.

That’s the exact opposite of what libraries are supposed to do. Libraries are for everyone, they teach that shit day 1 of liberry skool. I know because I have a liberry degree. It’s in a fancy frame so you know it’s legit. Right now, I’m working on a robot fight club for our teen department and I would be thrilled if…

I will now bill everyone’s insurance for therapy services.

All the points and stars for the Eddie Izzard reference.

I have yet to master the bold eyeliner. It always looks janky on me, plus once I poked myself in the eye with a liquid liner brush and spent like 30 minutes rinsing off my very angry eyeball. Trauma! But I love it when someone does it for me, especially a nice dramatic cat’s eye. I am kind of embarrassed to admit…

I’ve always struggled with my weight and an unhealthy relationship with food. I find it interesting that a lot of us commenting tonight talk about depression and mental illness. I’ve always believed that my eating issues are a symptom of my diagnosed illness, bipolar disorder. I live with depression and anxiety every…

Once, I was helping a friend move into her dorm room and this motherfucker came skittering out of the bathroom. It’s called a child of the earth around here and if you can’t tell from the picture, it’s about the size of a hand. There was much screaming and surprisingly agile movements made with a broom until it died.…

I love my mom, but sometimes I think she’s a cyborg and cannot comprehend humans. Fact- mom hates interior design, I love it, so I usually make those decisions for her. Anyway, once I was in the hospital, ICU, to be exact, intubated and drugged out of my mind. My mom was working on a remodeling project for work which…

Cool, thank you! I'll double-check about her preferences and I'm pulling up those websites as I type!

Question- I have a relative visiting soon who is a strict vegan. My family and I are all meat and animal product eaters, so none of us have any idea what to look for or avoid. I want to be sure that I have the right kind of nibbles and drinks and meals for her. What are some of your favorite vegan foods and drinks?…

This week’s transformation was lovely. I especially liked the lip color. It was subtle with a nice pearly sheen that didn’t overwhelm. And the eyes...the MUA did a great job bringing out your eyes, they’re such a pretty green, they really popped (in a nice way) with the neutral shadow and mascara.

I can't girl at all. Last time I tried to do liquid eyeliner I poked myself in the eye and ended up with an eyeball full of black liner. I'm just terrible at it.

He gets his point across.

I have given up making the bed. King Kong over here prefers it.

My family enjoys delivering sick burns. It’s how we show love. However, sometimes I do a little burn on strangers if they deserve it. Case in point: I run a library. One day, I was doing a walk-around the building, checking in stairwells and such (we’re a downtown branch, we have a large homeless and transient…

THIS MOVIE WAS WHY I WENT TO LIBRARY SCHOOL! Man, was I disappointed. Hah! Just kidding. If you've ever been to an American Library Association conference, you know it's all Molly and orgies. Very well organized orgies.

Yay! I have a troll! Misandry, misandry, misandry.

I’ve been in public service dealing with perverts, people in the midst of a psychotic break, assholes, misoginistic assholes, every variety of asshole, really, and I’m used to dealing with them. I can’t really afford to be afraid since PD requires that I go up to the person and tell them they are permanently banned.…