A Bridge Over The River Cry.

Torii Hunter is the best sports baby.

Do you check Tom Ley, or do you stuff him in the overhead?

You don't mean that.

You know who likes Skyline Chili? Like, heaping piles of it?
Tom fuckin Ley.
I know, what a dip.

Which dip is better?

NCAA edition: University of Missouri

"It's like footie, but super gay."

The union of course is banking on the fact that the football players will have absolutely no recollection of joining the union.

Tom, do you ever just wake up, rub your eyes and look out the basement window greeting the morning sun with a smile?
Rub the sleep out of your eyes, say hi to mom as she passes by you walking down the stairs with a big hamper full of laundry? I bet sometimes dad is at the table reading the 'times, quietly disagreeing…

Does '12' signify the amount of times her mother punched her while she was in the womb?

I'd punch you if you didn't hold the key to my beating heart.

How do you get the awful out of Tom Ley?

I quite enjoy drunkspin, keep up the fantastic work.
Sidenote: I shoot Bombay Sapphire from time to time. It's kind of like "Ya, i'm pretty cool, I don't shoot Jack Daniels or Sauza Silver like all these other degenerate 9 to 5'ers. But at the same time, I'm too much of a fucking pussy to slug back half an ounce of…

The scouting report I read has him pegged as a solid striker with razor-sharp accuracy.
He negotiated his own contract, after firing his lawyer Harry Ellis. He has expensive taste I hear, as his affinity for John Phillips suits clearly demonstrates. All in all a good pick up for the firm. Keep an eye on his younger…

A submission for the 'Cool Story Bro' category. I attempted to make a 'Bad Lip Breeding' joke involving a close-up image of Donovan McNabb's enormous lips. However I couldn't angle it without it coming across as vaguely racist. I think the 'breeding' terminology sets off alarm bells and notifies all of Gawker and it's…

This was a Goddam good read. Thanks Barry.

Isn't that like kicking a pitcher off a baseball team for throwing strikes?

It beats Dennis Rodman's new nickname, "The Kim Creeper"

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