Excellent preparation prior to him drinking the English Channel.

"We've got two priests in here. They'd probably vouch for me."

The new "Olympic Ring" tattoo.

All these IDs get older...I stay the same age.

speed kills.

Kenny Powers Tan

That's the best. Well done.

It's her life. It's now or never. She doesn't want to live forever.

PYT: pretend you tipped.

There's deeper cuts than that quote.

Thank God it's not a heavy Flo week.

Manti T'eo looks like shit.

You'd know better than me.

Those ass-less chaps have done it again.

It only took 1 Watt.

...even if they grew up in the super-white, John Hughes parts of Chicago like I did, dipshits from Chicago will always ACT as if they grew up near Cabrini Green and spent their formative years bootlegging for Al Capone. HE PULLS A KNIFE, YOU PULL A ZIMA. The whitest areas of Chicago are basically Portland, with…

Thanks!

Dick joke. C'mon with the o-line chatter.

It's spelled "deadspin."