WHERE IS CAITY?

New font?

I worked at a bookstore where we found a gymbag with multiple loaded pistols under a cafe table. It belonged to the GM’s husband, who had just stopped in with their TWIN BABIES. But at least they were safe from the bad guys.

This is why we’ve decided mom will stay home even though that entails poverty.

On the off chance that this hangnail kills her campaign it might just save the Democratic Party.

What a fucking idiot. Did he drunk type that message with his dick?

The only thing that could make HRC’s tv habits more terrifying is if she’d included Veep. (I love all those shows, but lack her history and ambition.) I also love the idea of Hillary refusing to schedule a meeting with, like, Steven Spielberg and Bill Gates because of what time a show is on.

Whoa, now. I’m frequently team #fuckwhitepeople, but “Trump... a front-runner for white people” is a bridge too far.

I’ve seen people shouting about this all day and, now that I’ve seen the original quote, I’m pretty disappointed in Coates. He is being disingenuous as fuck.

Same with law. Got a DUI? Sorry. You can’t be a lawyer. Just got out of prison for insider trading? Here’s your license back.

Not for long.

THEY AREN’T A PROBLEM IF EVERYONE GETS VACCINATED

Can I a guy get ungreyed over here?

Aaron Rodgers is one on-message dude. Most politicians don’t have that kind of discipline.

Wow. Alternate universe Full House is ugly.

That show was great! But it was on for seven years? It couldn’t possibly have been great for seven years.

All of the excitable and emotional bros in the Merrill Lynch Chicago office where I used to work are probably very sad about this. They will express their sadness in much the same way they express their happiness or ennui: getting fucked up at the bar downstairs, saying vaguely creepy things to the youngest woman who…

Have you ever met a teenager?

Really, undergrad-aged people should date other people in that range, otherwise there’s a pretty dramatic imbalance in life experience. A 20 year old dating a 16 year old or a 25 year old is kind of gross. Once you’re 23 or 24, the 1/2 x + 7 rule works fine (until somebody turns 60, then it’s gross again).