Not only is the Diplo thing not shade, it's not even a read. Taylor makes fun of herself for not having ass in the Shake It Off video. Once someone has deliberately drawn attention to something - especially in a playful or self-effacing way - you lose the power to hurt her by pointing it out.

And that's how you read.

I guarantee I have at least two Facebook friends who actually believe this.

You probably have met them but didn't realize it, because they weren't all, "Hi, my name is Joe and MEAT IS MURDER."

I really need to make a T-shirt that says "THE VEGANS YOU'VE READ ABOUT DO NOT REPRESENT ME."

Your love of Taylor Swift is delightful, and one of my favorite things about you.

Well, they're on tour with...Nickelback...right now, so...yeah.

Multiply that by 10 and that's how good they are live.

Oui. I got free tickets to see her play and I was blown away.

I see the guy with braids and the guy who takes her to the tour bus on Hollywood Bl. every day. They are not tourists. The teal STAFF shirt belongs to another tour bus operator: I don't recognize the guy, but he is not a tourist either. The only guy who was probably a tourist was the guy with the accent. Maybe the guy…

I work on Hollywood Boulevard and I recognize two of those guys. The one with the tour bus is 100% creep all day every day.

OK good, I'm not the only one who doesn't know.

It's not even a first world problem. West African people have weddings, too. Presumably, some of the Ebola survivors in West Africa also had their wedding plans ruined. And they're probably disappointed about it.

this will never, ever happen here

I only watched the first episode. Well, the first 15 minutes of the first episode. Then I was like, "This is unwatchable," and turned it off. Neither of the characters was likeable or believable in any way.

I figured she was pointing out that Molly mostly isn't even real E anymore.

Funny, I've never had Sbarro cancel my order, offer to get me a new order in a few days, and then refuse to refund my money so I could go somewhere else.

The statement "Thanks for ruining bologna for me" makes no sense. It's like saying "Thanks for ruining dental surgery for me."

Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell is an amazing book.

Any Discworld novel. It will indulge your cynicism about the world while making you laugh. That's what I read when I've gone too far down the Everything Is Horrible rabbit hole.