Me too... I am kind of like a burn and salt the fields lady when it comes to my nails. When they start to get ragged and annoying I just clip them down to the finger and file them to smoothness. But they regrow really fast, within a week or two. Am I young and taking my nails for granted? Will I soon want to salvage…

I have a cat like this, except with a little less kitty parkour. She is more prone to repeated periods of insane running from room to room and over furniture, climbing all over me, and if I do not respond, sitting about a foot away from me, just out of arms reach, and making epic, sad repeated yowls for attention. I'd…

Yeah, I had a teacher in elementary school who'd been crippled by polio and had to wear a brace. I am extremely glad I grew up in a time when everyone (for the most part) believed in vaccination and the worst childhood disease I had to suffer through was the chicken pox. I hear people talk now about how its stupid to…

It's funny that this lady thinks her sons' (and their entire generation's!) narcissism is the problem when this article is basically just a hugely narcissistic and very public exercise in uber mom guilt. Seriously lady: Study the wall of self-protecting theories and lies you've built up around yourself any closer and…

I live in Louisiana (and I'm also allergic to shellfish) and it's the same thing with crawfish.

Some people know no pain. My mom is an operating room nurse. She looks like your average tiny Midwestern mom but she turns into a crazy badass at the sight of blood and guts. Once she broke her arm on a trip with my dad to a city a couple of hours away from their home, but she didn't want to waste time on a trip to a…

Metaphors aside, literal flocks of birds also make me feel like this.

When I was a kid I seriously sliced open my hand because my aunt was a weird collector lady and I knocked one of her collectable glass jam jar glasses off the counter and tried to catch it in my hand — spoiler alert, it broke in my palm and stabbed me all over the place. My aunt was like, WHO CARES?

Yeah. I was at a day camp where we did this once. But there was no fence and dish soap was used and an asphalt road at the bottom so I totally know where your story was going. My butt was never the same.

This is gonna get buried but here goes:

For real. I was kind of excited about this because my boyfriend is obsessed with Jose Gonzalez but this is the musical equivalent of taking an elevator to Old Navy or shopping with with your mom when you're back from college for holiday snacks at the grocery store.

Yeah... but you still gotta have some kinda foundation in the first place to do it. When you're scrambling to cover your bills month to month you can't really just plunk money away for any kind of travel unless you're willing to take a huge risk or you're doing some kind of work-travel (which is what a lot of poor-ish…

Haha. I was going to say this. I don't even like the normal wetspot that sex produces, let alone a tidal wave of vaginal fluid. Squirting seems interesting but inconvenient.

Oh my God, are you my mom?

It's worse cause my dad has a giant Tom Sellack mustache.

When I went home for Christmas my hometown had just gotten Lyft (the rideshare app known for putting giant pink mustaches on its cars) and I had to explain to my mom why it was a bad idea to call them "mustache rides." I died a little.

I used to work 8 hour shifts at an ice cream shop the summer of my freshman year in college. We were allowed one scoop of ice cream and unlimited coffee per shift so that would be my lunch and dinner, and sometimes I'd steal a couple of brownies or convince the guy who had a crush on me at the deli next door to share…

I'm sorry dude, but there are multiple officers behind and in front of that dancing guy. He has his hands free and is wearing slim-cut clothes and doesn't appear to be carrying anything dangerous. The worst threat is that he's being obnoxious. Part of being an officer is supposed to be forming a relationship with the…

It is definitely some major bullshit. But they did give me my holiday pay at least? So technically Friday was my last day but they're paying me for the two weeks I'd be getting off, through Jan. 2. Not that I still don't think it's some major bullshit as well. And I know it didn't have anything to do with the fiscal…

Thanks! That's good advice. One of the biggest problems I've been having, honestly, is that there's not much I can do about it over the holidays. My official "lay off" date is Jan. 2 but I got laid off right before the break (I worked for a university) so I'm stuck at home and can't apply for unemployment yet, and…