Try an audiobook of his short stories and listen to them while walking around town after dark. Go down every dark alley you see. Then you're in the right mood.

Re read my comment. I said exactly what you said :)

But that makes writing such a chore, it really does. It also makes for stiff fiction.

Well Human Comprehension doesn't account for what we can't comprehend, so things that we can comprehend tend to be more real and thus, scarier.

He still scares on the 7th read.

Wow, that sounds… kinda boring, actually.

I read that in Mr. Garrison's voice.

I laughed too hard at that.

Gunter: He schtole it und now instead of Deutschland's greatest beer we merely have fourth best behind Steinemarzen, Rottenburger, und… und…?

If I could make a wish I would ask for both the Cardinals and the Dodgers to all forget to wear a cup on Gameday, and do a lot of baserunning and sliding.

How 'bout just "Anyone but the Cardinals?" I'll settle for that.

Sure, if he's commenting on Riggs snapping towels in the locker room at the station.

I can't understand what you mean, but I soon will.

Yeah, Lethal Weapon 4 is the most "Mid 90's" a movie could ever get. It's like an episode of Friends but with Guns.

and then he ran full speed and dove into a Christmas Tree.

You are, right now. Look in the mirror, asshole.

You're wrong. You're just…. wrong.

Oh you know everything, don't you, fucknut?

no their problem. Go pat yourself on the back somewhere else dickhead.

You must have money falling out of your asshole, because if I did that for every person who asked me for money it would cost me $500 a day. Fuck you.