The nutrition regimen seems questionable, like they’re just throwing stuff at the wall to see what sticks.

I like my centers al dente

Sure, Bobroczkyi looks stiff out there. But you should see how ten minutes in bubbling hot water relaxes him.

At least there were 6. Had he only been able to see three, he’d have really gotten P.O.

Just wait for the headline for the article detailing the Bills’ toxic locker room situation now that Richie Incognito is on the team:

QBs become do bees to throw BBs past CBs. Me? I’ll be listening to the dBs cover the Bee Gees at CBGB while eating Arby’s and consulting E.B. on the proper usage of “Heebie Jeebies.”

Playoffs, dues and Bs are just a few of the things Cam Newton didn't get in college.

John Swoletrain

I’ll keep saying it until some producer picks it up- there needs to be a TV show “Black People Reacting to Things They Like.” It looks like someone behind the bench yelled grenade.

If only there were a character in Star Wars canon known for his propensity to shoot first...

I don’t know, that looks pretty good by Kobe’s standards. He hit at least one out of five there.

The source then clarified that old is, in fact, an acronym for “on lots of drugs.”

“Once they did away with the set shot, I kniew I was wasting my time.”

Ejected? That seems a bit extreme. I mean, Jason initiated contact and he only ended up getting a slap on the wrist for it.

It’s a weird regional Detroit thing. He also calls three pointers “triples”, and calls Mitch Albom “talented.”

This whole thing is dumb, and Trump is dumb, and Brady is dumb, and I feel dumb, and you’re probably dumb. But I still have this dream that Muhammad Wilkerson sacks the shit out of Brady like 11 times on December 27 and then, standing over him, says something overtly Snipes-esque, like, “As-Salaam-Alaikum,…

This is so fucking stupid. 99% of the time people who complain about “gotcha journalism” are just idiots who can’t figure out the SUPER DUPER EASY WAYS not to say something stupid. If you want to be “brave,” the answer is “Donald Trump is a friend, but that doesn’t mean I endorse all of his policy positions or agree…

Here’s a fun little trick that I learned from Gene Weingarten and like to occasionally pass along. When you remove all the vowels from Reince Priebus’s name you are left with RNC PR BS. You don’t even need to rearrange them.

In DC, this logic makes perfect sense. Just think of @redskinsfacts as a Super PAC for the Washington football team, and all of your accusations vanish into the wind.

Robert obviously confused defense with defenestrate.