Defense Lawyer: Were you trained in football deflation devices?

"Thank you for calling Comcast - can you please confirm the name on your account?"

You could always ask them to upgrade your service to the MegaBitch tier.

If that happened to me, I'd just leave it.

He gets a pass all because his brother is a good neighbor.

LeBron James @KingJames * 4h

Sad when the news chopper was later shot down. RIP Brian Williams

R.I.P. DJ Screw :(

This fking killed me. Now I'm wondering how many equals signs would be necessary for me to consider this kind of invitation if it was sent to me.

8=====D ({})

Execution. They're not changing how the game operates, only how input is applied to it. Memory tricks like this are somewhat contentious because they often are practically possible for a real player to execute, but as TASBot demonstrations have shown, they're still within the scope of what's possible with the actual…

What do you mean editing the game? What type of speedrun allows that?

controller inputs.

Tool-assisted speedruns aren't editing the game.

If you don't think this counts, you need to realize you're not really playing the same game they are. They've applied an arbitrary ruleset to an existing game. Like using a basketball court for some variant, or perhaps parkour in the same space as a marathon.

Good thing nobody cares about your opinion.

I don't mean to brag, but I don't have to have sex with unconscious people to have sex.

2014: NFL suspends Gordon 10 games

No irony in the fact that atheist extremists are obnoxious assholes, and religious extremists are blowing people up, I suppose. But yeah, totally hate those atheist guys.

Doctor: Bad news, Mr. Armstrong. Your cancer has metastasized.