How many times do they have to tell you they don’t start serving lunch until 10:15? Your fault at this point imo

Great. Now I’m crying in a McDonald’s. And it's not for any of the usual reasons.

A) this is spot on

I’m disappointed there wasn’t mention that this was a race-related killing.

My favorite response was left out:

You have never hung out with a baseball player.

I used to think like this until I had the opportunity to talk to a driver. Most people have no idea how much science goes into driving a race car. Drivers know a lot about physics, as well as being able to recognize what is going on with their car and how to diagnose and solve problems. Air pressure in tires, drag,…

the best clap back

I’m a veteran of three dozen wars. Name a body part and a planet and I’ve taken a bullet in it, on it. All to keep our flag flying free.

“You guys are heroes”

Yet another pastime ruined by instant replays.

“They only showed him kill that guy on replay” is my favorite comeback of all time now. Find that hill and die on it, buddy.

Colin Kapernick should stick to *watches recent game film* uh actually politics and social media

Conservatives on big government: “I made this money with my own hard work, I didn’t need the government’s help.”

i wasn’t talking to you

I put a bullet in a seagull’s head

When I was job hunting a bit less than a decade ago, the “common wisdom” among my fellow interviewee ladies was also that you shouldn’t wear an engagement (or wedding) ring—but back then the reasoning was not that potential employers would assume you were high maintenance. Rather, the rumored thinking was that an…

Which puts him in the ranks of notable punchlines and losers such as Steve Nash, Pete Maravich, George Gervin, and Dominique Wilkins.

Melo has led his team to the playoffs in 10 of his 13 NBA seasons.

How awesome would it be if Olympic wrestling allowed professionals?