funnymonkeys
funnymonkey
funnymonkeys

There will be hundreds of books written about this presidency. Both why it happened and the many, many ways he illustrates what not to do. How not to govern, how to fuck up diplomacy, how to demotivate employees, how not to lead, the signs of Alzheimers/dementia/narcissism. He’s a walking case study for scores of

Because he’s never actually DONE anything. He was born wealthy, and lucked into more money (maybe, probably not as much as he says). His business was successful (kinda) in spite of him, not because of him.

Sadly, out of the 65 million Trump voters, many of them are educated and should have known better.

He’s not making it up, he’s guessing. He has literally never thought about how many people are on the planet and what countries have the most people. I would be willing to bet he couldn’t name 30 countries, let alone have any idea to their relative size.

I swear I learned about Emmett Till in school, and I went to Catholic school in Georgia. Seventh grade sounds about right, so that would have been about 1992 (?ish?). Definitely not a progressive school.

This is the only appropriate response. Gross.

I mean, he shouldn’t be talking about anyone; no one asked his opinion. But she is flat-out stunning. Literally never seen a bad picture of her.

I love Billy Connolly. I’ve never seen that clip before.

Between the ‘grab them by the pussy’ comment and saying McCain is not a hero just because he was a POW it is abundantly clear that none of the republican ‘values’ mean anything to any of them. I have no love for McCain, but I always thought veterans and especially POWs were sacrosanct. You can disagree on a lot, but I

My mom used to say “save that language for your friends.” And my dad used to always tell us that people who swear just aren’t smart enough to come up with a better way to express themselves. Now, of course, my dad throws in so many “hells” and “damns” that I have to ask him to watch his language in front of my kids.

“Who the hell wants to speak about politics...”

“Compact spherical majesty” is how I’m going to describe myself from now on. I love that.

And short sizes that aren’t inexplicably smaller than the regular? Like, literally just shorter. Fucking petites running almost a full size smaller than the equivalent regular size drives me crazy.

When was the last time McCain stood for anything? He has said some reasonable stuff against the Republican agenda since Trump was elected, but then he just goes and votes for it anyway. He’s all talk. It’s sad because he talks like the only reasonable Republican with half a brain left, but he never actually opposes

Right? Aren’t you supposed to have a shirt on in public? As a lady, I don’t worry about whether or not there’s a “no shirt, no service” policy, because I prefer to wear a shirt. But, can you just be shirtless at a baseball game?

I think you are spot-on. Wonder Woman is at least as well-known as Superman and hasn’t had a major movie about her, ever. I was dying to see it. I also did not realize she was in BvS or MoS. I kind of remember hearing about it now, but when I went to see Wonder Woman in the theaters it was the first time I saw Gal

I think he’s always too confused to lie. He hears things, he doesn’t remember where he hears them, but he hears them. Then a small part of what he heard sticks in his brain and he ad-libs what he thinks are logical conclusions from that one half-fact that he remembered. In the case of the mysteriously cast 5 million

R. Kelly raping underage girls, Bill Cosby drugging and raping women, Usher knowingly (? I’m assuming) passing on an STD - those are all illegal (I think knowingly infecting someone is? Maybe just for HIV?) and at the very least, morally repugnant. Kevin Hart cheating on his wife and / or fiancee? Is not illegal, and

Mine does this too! It flips to the left, no matter what I do. So, the right side flips under and the left side flips out. My best hope is lots of product and a flat iron to try and get both sides just straight. I can’t do the curl under thing.

I don’t know about dating Whoopi Goldberg, but stories like Ted & Mary are what kept me going when I was single. Compared to the vast majority of my friends, I was kind of a late bloomer. Looking back now, it’s hilarious that I thought that, as I got married at 28. But it felt like everyone else was in a serious