4-5 Rams you say?

Well in Eli’s defense, those are the only kind of books the Bengals have in their locker room.

“Pffftt! Try catching a catfish.”

I’d be fine if they just had a dedicated crew in the booth that would look at replays instead of having all the refs talk it over, then jog over to “go under the hood.” Someone upstairs just comes over the earpiece, “yep, he got both feet in.” Resume play.

It’s a real kick in the nuts.

I took it as half Joker half Bruce Wayne. Like “hey, I might not be the hero” or whatever.

I mean, going back to last year they have lost their last four games.

Doesn’t Penn State already have the contract with Nickelodeon?

This feels silly to type, but what impresses me most about Marshawn stories is they all seem to illustrate a man who is tremendously present. He doesn’t seem to be somewhere else when people interact with him. He doesn’t have alternate plans. He doesn’t decline the invite. The focus and mindset he demonstrated as a…

Well, only if it’s fallen off a branch from one of the trees that make up the ubiquitous cheese groves blanketing the state. Otherwise, you have to pick it yourself.

I think we can rule out Derrick as a suspect if you just review his shooting percentage

All for a giant building that will be used 8 days of the year. Eight.

This is just the beginning. Just wait till they introduce those wonderful PSL’s to the Vegas fans. Basically fans can expect to pay anywhere from $10,000 to $45,000 dollars for one seat just for the “privilege” to then purchase absurdly priced season tickets. Yes the PSL is a one time fee, but when you consider…

*Insurance adjuster shows up*

What in the actual fuck is going on here? This is not Deadspin. Deadspin in a sports blog. Where the fuck are the sports? I come looking for stories about football and this is the shit that is on Deadspin?

The article failed to mention that the particular strain of imaginary weed he was carrying is called Fantasy Tears.

Catch this.

It’s the orange and blue. THINK ABOUT IT. He can only succeed in those colors. Florida, Denver, and now the Mets!!

Sadly, he had no idea what to do when he reached third base

He needs a leg to stand on, first.