Even better, getting called at 6am because my boss is panicking because the internet is down (two hours before prod begins, but whatever, might as well fix it immediately).

Subject: Not Working
Description: Computer not working

First comment from me: Can you describe your problem in more detail, please?
First comment from user: Fixed! (closes case)

Easiest case closure I ever had...

“So I’ll need you to actually reboot your Linux box.”
“I did yesterday.”
“Obviously you didn’t, because I just SSH’d into it, and your uptime is 37 days.”

That said, I once spent 30 minutes bashing my head against a desktop that wouldn’t boot, only to find out I hadn’t plugged the power cable into the boot hard drive.…

I took my car in to get the summer tires swapped for snows (brought my own tires on rims, so it was just a straight swap and align deal), and when I got back in my car, every surface reachable by human arms was coated in mud. They’d put a paper mat on the floor (on top of my deep all-weather mats, lolthx), but managed…

Two of us in my GoT watching group read the spoilers ahead of time and we made the executive decision to skip the last scene of the show. Good on the writers to back load that so it was more skippable.

This one’s my dad’s EDC, and I’m mildly jealous. It’s a bit fatter in the pocket than I’d like these days, but it feels SOLID, and the caribener/bottle opener clip is clever and slots fully out of the way when you don’t need it. Pretty sure I got it for him in a box set at Coscto with some sort of minitool a couple…

Not a fan of this one. It feels great, but the frame lock tends to lose its locking ability over time, and after the 3rd time it unlocked and bit the backs of my fingers, I decomissioned it in favor of an inexpensive-but-beefy Coast DX340 with a liner lock and secondary back lock. Not my favorite, but it’ll tide me…

I’m not sure modifying the input/output data the ECU works with would count since you’re not altering or even viewing the source code. If you knew what the code was and then built a cold air or ram air intake that specifically tricked the ECU into doing something, that might be actionable because it would involve the…

I worked a university IT job where we all had free counseling as a benefit because it wasn't uncommon for us to run across child porn while working on student and staff machines.

In Portland, it’s, “Well THAT’S interesting.”

The Lyme Disease conspiracy theory is so bugfuck bonkers. I read about it ages ago while living with an epidemiologist, and then picked the thread up a decade later when a friend of mine contracted the disease. (He later killed himself due to the neurological changes and chronic pain...this shit is no joke.)

I dealt with this after a friend's brother passed away unexpectedly. Apple has no process in place for accessing a deceased person's devices or accounts.

I worked at a law firm where our sole HR/personnel manager left abruptly, and his replacement went on maternity leave the day after she moved into his office.

I really like Natalia Kills's music :1 Been a fan for years.

My dad says it, occasionally, and as ironically as the most unironic human on earth can muster.

Geezus, I'm still in the greys?

I wasn't in the hotel when this happened, thank heavens, but I can only imagine the Yelp reviews from the people in the room at the time.

Rob: Portland: "We didn't invent anything, but we made it extra organic and pretentious as hell."

Happened to one of my English teachers. Super early in the morning, she's stopped at a 4-way intersection, and a deer launches out of the darkness, body-slams her car, hooks the driver's side mirror on his antlers, and runs away with it.

Sweet merciful fuck.