fthotfitzgeraldii
F. Thot Fitzgerald II: Existential Boogaloo
fthotfitzgeraldii

Would welcome the opportunity to educate you.

“The governor believes that protection of rights is important”

Balls. I’m disappointed but not surprised at how brazen and thinly veiled this shit is.

I’m not usually a conspiracy theorist either, but I’m inclined to agree. The phrase “take her out” has a very specific context. Those words coupled with the exchanges over WhatsApp that Parnas leaked paint a very insidious picture.

If anything, her response has made me re-evaluate my desire to be trophy wife. 

I thought they were going to shave his testimony for later!

That first bullet, man. As someone who was involved with childcare, I knew so many wealthy parents who were constantly playing “learning” games with their kids which basically amounted to them quizzing them until they burnt out and shut down entirely.

Is this a mom and 2 kids looking for someone to love and to love them back?!

Saaaaaaame

Normal! Super normal and super good! This isn’t a harbinger for darker things to come at all ahahaha...now if you’ll excuse me I’ll just...be over here...

No problem! And I know I’ve seen people use the phrase before, but for some reason I can’t remember for the life of me what the context was. That sounds correct, though. :P

I am THIS close to giving up brown liquor in favor of whatever the people at goop are smoking.

Isn’t she just? In fact, think several people associated with this regime also probably fit the bill. Think if we convinced them to run an obstacle course we could also convince Cleese to narrate?

And also the same people who spent many of their formative years being pumped full of hot air and stories about Christian martyrdom. Finding no lion’s dens handy, they’ve decided everything that they disagree with is persecuting or oppressing them in some way.

$80 vag eggs.

I can’t have M&Ms due to a peanut allergy (even the plain ones have trace amounts that trigger a reaction), or else I would totally be down for a visit. I’ve always kind of loved their commercials, though. Every time one of their ads crosses my feed on Instagram, I always ask them the same question:

Like many of her fellow Upperclass Twits, she doesn’t know when she’s beaten. She doesn’t know when she’s winning either. She has no sensory apparatus at all.

Even intelligent conservative-minded folks

Holy shit I can’t unsee it now. It’s so fitting. 

I feel like she saw White Chicks and felt personally attacked. 

1. I’m going to have to watch Finding Forrester