This is on Jezebel because there’s no reason it shouldn’t be.

Will it make Marcy Long non-essential?

Reminds me a lot of Ricky Williams, seeing such a promising career cut short by grass.

“And I have no right to accept censorship based on what broadcasting is.”

A lasagna the size of a barge.

Solid parry by the guy with the baseball bat

Yeah I don’t think she’s into it, I’ll have to keep listening to the song.

The eyes right before it jumps at the camera. I CANNOT UN-SEE.

Don’t worry... soon she’ll restructure the sentence and fire 30,000 words.

Counterpoint: continue outsourcing our tales of woe (it’s always woe) because they are nearly always interesting reads.

Jesus is the only one who can perform miracles, like having a perfect 15-1 season.

As a Bulls fan, how much money does he want?

Still a better defender than James Harden.

I came accross a group of super-mutants who were arguing over a captive at night. I should have paid more attention but I bet they were arguing over how to cook him, ala The Hobbit.

To be fair, nobody gives a flying fuck about the Chiefs even though they’re a likely wild card team, while the Panthers are 10-1 and Super Bowl bound barring any catastrophes.

A roommate of mine and myself found ourselves on our own

Ditto that for anything mentioning a man sustaining carpal tunnel in his shoulder from an extended “air wank”

If in a few months there are medical journal articles describing an incident where a man’s eyes rolled right out of his head, that was me, today, reading this comment.

I’m going to set the over-under at 10 for #NotAllMidwesterners/“YOU’RE JUST SOME SNOBBY NEW YORKER, FUCK YOU” responses to this.

What the fuck is going on here today?