True story: Red Dawn scared me so badly when I was little that I learned the Soviet anthem in Russian, just in case we lost the cold war.

We’re in 2017 — something like this should not happen in America.

What a complete disaster. This was supposed to play instead of the Star Spangled Banner.

The thing I have come to understand about people like Jim Boeheim is every god damn thing is an opportunity to talk about how unfair everyone is to him. That comment had shit to do with Fab Melo, and everything to do with reminding everyone how unfair it was that Jim Boeheim’s basketball team was sanctioned before the…

But he’s the most harmless thing. Something Fab loved from his childhood. Something that could never ever possibly destroy him.

Right now the top suspect is his brother Marsh. I’ll leave now

For a minute there Phil Jackson saw “Former Syracuse Star Melo Dies” and got super excited.

Because they care less about winning than looking stupid. Even though air-balling two free throws in a row (DeAndre!) or shooting a CAREER-HIGH 43% from the line (Drummond!) looks pretty fucking stupid to me.

Wow that must have been really, really sad. Being in Detroit, I mean.

Nice to see that he was given his due to the tune of hundreds of millions of taxpayer dollars while the city was bankrupt.

There’s only so many words that rhyme with other words, I have never heard someone critical of a song that uses words that actually rhyme. Usually you poke fun when an artist tries to make two words rhyme that don’t at all (Like taxes and Texas).

This is the only reasonable argument against the DH.

Now witness the power of this fully armed and operational elementary school!

an injured Willis Reed unexpected limps out of the players tunnel and, as the crowd goes wild, totally kicks Nolan’s ass.

FOR GOD SAKE NO ONE TELL BETSY DEVOS!

Note that none of them denied sucking Dolan’s dick.

You are mad because Greenbaum uses words that actually rhyme?

Timmy D Financial Services will include a ten pack of Old Navy boxers for every advice.

Its Tim Duncan... he smuggles a case of water via cargo pants. Have you seen the size of those pants?

I’ll see your Steve Miller and raise you one Norman Greenbaum who in a single stanza manages to make the genius level rhyming connections of “sky” and “die” and then matches “rest” with “best.” Oh and lest you think that is not quite clever enough, try to wrap your mind at the synapse connections firing in his brain…