I know your pain (literally!). I have Crohn’s and am getting my 3rd small bowel resection this month. It’s so frustrating explaining to people why I can’t have nuts. (No, I do not have a nut allergy, yes I can eat nut butters, but the whole or chopped ones could get stuck in my intestine and cause an abscess or…

I’m allergic to cream. Just cream - no other dairy (although I don’t drink milk or eat yogurt anymore by choice so things may have changed in the past few years) and people flatly refuse to believe me. I’m constantly forced to participate in the “what happens if you do” game. My boyfriend finally saw the outcome for…

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Oh, and she was also in several episodes of Girls.

because fuck going to school - if you’re not it by 6, fuck you entirely.

I hate everybody and everything.

Jeeze, I’m just lactose intolerant and people either treat me like I’m about to die or like I’m lying through my teeth when they find out. I’ve had acquaintances try and throw friends’ pizza away to “protect” me, while others want all the details. (“So, what happens if you eat something with dairy in it?” “I take my…

Because for some reason, nothing turns people into pedantic, self-righteous assholes like what other people consume and why.

My favorite is when I’m all, “stuff that’s not polite to discuss at the table,” (because of course the questions always come when we’re eating) and they respond, “No, really, tell me.” My usual answer is something along the lines of “gastrointestinal issues immediately, autoimmune flare issues long-term,” but then…

THIS.

Yes! and it’s always during dinner too. Not such a good time to explain these details. But yet, even though I’m lactose intolerant, and we don’t want to discuss my reaction to dairy while we’re trying to eat, I still find myself being curious about other people’s reactions to their own allergic foods. Maybe I just…

Somewhat unrelated, my dog can’t eat meat—he has portosystemic liver shunt disease and can’t tolerate the protein. If you want to be looked at like an asshole, try going into a pet store and asking for vegetarian food for your dog. The folks behind the counter get it, but there’s always serious side-eye from the other…

“Because anaphylaxis is the only *real* type of allergic reaction and anything else is just being picky or whiny.” Something I have actually heard people say and at least one of them honestly thought it was a scientific fact. At least a some of them changed their tune when I explained the reactions my friends with…

Right? His upward mobility matters when not being upwardly mobile is an offence worthy of the death penalty minus due process or a trial.

I thought you guys made up that “not on the path to upward mobility” line. Holy shit. You didn’t. Fuck you, Brooks.

Death also gets in the way of upward mobility.

He’s like a college freshman starting their essay on poverty with “From the beginning of time, there have been people, and some of them have been poor.”

“So* He’s like a college freshman starting his essay on poverty with “From the beginning of time, there have been people, and some of them have been poor.” “

Sorry, why are we paying attention to ANYTHING David Brooks says, again?