wow... fu julianne. i almost completely forgot about karmin!!!

Contact the author at mark.shrayber@jezebel.com.

It reminds me of when I tried to name all the One Directions and I forgot if there were 4 or 5 so I just threw in "Niles" and "Allen". My younger cousin was not impressed.

#jesuisMark. We are all Mark.

Oh Mark. Sweet, sweet Mark.

I made the mistake of clicking on the Gerber sandwich link:

Oh, no! A husband extolling his love for his wife. The HORROR. How will we, as a society, get through this, guys? Everybody knows he should just call her a dumb whore bitch slut like the rest of us and anything beyond that is just offensive to our greater sensibilities.

I cannot fathom for the life of me why someone would consistently wanna date twenty something's

I mean you do you Madonna but I cannot fathom for the life of me why someone would consistently wanna date twenty something's. I am a twenty-something and all I do is complain about how hard it is to find someone in my age area.

I feel the same way about the US government having a monopoly on all nuclear weapons.

Ha! You just reminded me of the once all-girls College of Notre Dame of Maryland - slyly abbreviated to...

When a mother is forced to keep a pregnancy whether by societal pressure, law or religious dogma, whatever the initial intentions, the net effect is that is her health is put at risk. If the value system is such that there is a greater importance in keeping a pregnancy then that system imposes that risk on the mother,…

Hahaha. I attended a Catholic high school and I had forgotten just how casually people in those institutions can pepper their language with complete non sequiturs about "the rights of the unborn". Whether it was in mass, daily prayer, biology classes, gov/civ classes, art classes, daily announcements, sporting events,…

Somewhere below "delightful canapés."

This whole post is just bullying me because my mouth is too small and my lips are too thin to ever look normal wearing any type of lip color and now I'm crying.

I find their mouths (except for the last one) to be quite fake looking ... like they used that lip sucker thing to make their lips fuller.

I thought it was very reasonable that Becca didn't feel ready to get engaged to/move across the country for someone she's only known for a couple of months and who was dating twenty other women for most of the time. I haven't watched many seasons of the Bachelor(ette), but Becca might be the most normal person I've…

"Madonna has built her entire career on passing off other people's innovations as her own and making sure the original authors of things don't get as much credit for their work as she does." -Hillary Clinton

FALSE! Having kids only ruins your body is that's what happens to your body. There's no "letting it" or "not letting it." The best you can to is mitigate the damage (for lack of a better word) by eating right, exercising, etc etc etc all that jazz. Bodies are gonna do what they're gonna do, and the control we have…