Are you in fact, serious? Why is my text so large? Will it be thus when I post this information? Why did I bother making a Kinja account?

This Hittman has a lot of Hart.

Yeah, I don't really use any of the drive models, except the bass octaver which actually doesn't add any drive. I like the sound of my amp's drive channel as-is. I'm also the singer, so I appreciate the M13's expression pedals. Before each song I pick the effects I want and use the expression pedal to "turn them on".…

Honestly, I use all digital effects into a tube amp. And not even one of the new fancy multi-effects pedals. One of those Line 6 M13s. Easy of use and repeatability won the day over my old pedal board.

Hey, I made sure to note it was only for the rigors of my life-as-a-tour concept. When we finally track this on beautiful 2-inch tape for the vinyl record I'll switch to pure analog reverb and only the "warmest sounding" pre-amps and microphones.

That sounds awful. The best part about drummers being away from drums is they can't make loud clanging sounds at all time. Only another drummer would invent away for drummers always be drumming. They do it on their bodies all the time anyway.

I walk around with a digital* reverb unit on all the time so that everyone I meet thinks I'm more mysterious.

To re-purpose a common saying about pizza:
Small infinity is still infinity.

And depending on your particular naval position, it can be hell on your back.

I've got an extra case of Perr-Air around here somewhere…

I really like bison. Just tastes extra beefy to me, which I like.

The sexy was already back, he merely shot it.

Hmm, captive chimp grows into body and resents treatment by captors. Weird.

Wait 'til the kids are gone for the good furniture. My middle-of-the-road furniture is taking a beating right now.

Great place to send the members of your cult on their final journey to the eclipse god.

Sure, with that attitude.

It was that kind of weekend. Cleaned out the garage. Had a bunch of posts dug for new fence, but they were there really late and didn't bother picking up all the dug-up clay, so I had to get enough of that out of the way to mow the yard at peak heat. My old man back hurts.

As it has been related to me:
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Two apples a day keeps the proctologist away.

I remember asking my high school PreCal teacher some variant of that question and she didn't know the answer. I was genuinely curious, but also kind of being an asshole about it. Not too proud of myself, in retrospect.

We are very different people. Olives and hummus are some of my favorite things. I question your objectivity.