My friends keep finding knives that don’t belong to them in their broken into vehicles.

Yeah, but you’re making everyone else blow a gasket.

“The people on the porch quickly dispersed.”

What about the girl KEEPING THE BABY?!

And if you were a homosexual man you’d be checking dudes out, and it’d be literally no problem.

Or, because there’s no expectation of privacy in public, men can look.

Yeah I know, just messing with ya. When I said full strength I meant flavor.

The same way they describe wine as dry or sweet, beer is dry, bitter, sweet, etc. Not like soda, but sweeter than dry or bitter.

Try a Smirnoff ice.

I said it’s nearly %20 more alcohol and you confirmed it’s nearly %20 more alcohol. .8% ABV not .08% ABV. Have you been drinking?

Auto-fellatio

Must be rubberneckers for that used tire fire.

I was more yelling at the sky than asking you directly. Your mind is already made up and nothing can sway you from Thinking Different™

I just drink 11 instead of 12 a night.

So nearly 20% more?

The tint also traps heat and they burn out in a year.

The tint also traps heat and they burn out in a year.

Oh brother. You’re still trying?

Yup, why even waste time with lite beer? If you’re gonna drink swill better make it full strength.

There’s more to this story. Was the toilet paper over the front or behind? That’s grounds for protest.