a purple-haired lesbian surrounded by her teammates with giant “DARE TO SHINE” signs around her is like, an incredible image as we reach the end of Pride Month, it makes my gay little heart so fucking happy.

Matt Nagy is watching this over and over right now.

Not pictured, the too hard shelf and the too soft shelf.

I too wish the singers of bubble-gum pop music would more perfectly encapsulate the damage done by members of congress and the collective oligarchy in their bubble-gum pop music videos with people known for shooting fireworks from their boobs.

Somebody’s always getting hands on the Krafts, that’s for sure. 

Winston: Can I do your torso?
Winslow: No.
Winston: [does torso]

Everyone’s an armchair assassin.

TE Mark Murderer

Guy named “Chris Blewitt” is gonna be your kicker?  I don’t think so.  Who’s the QB ... Steve Piksix?  

Gardner Reaps What He Sows

Drake: I’m going to be the most dislikable courtside presence ever!

Who would have possibly thought that arming a bunch of non-combatants with minimal training would rapidly become more complicated than “good guy shoots bad guy?”

“Are you sure that’s a catch?”

FAKE POOS!

Jack Nicholson must be rolling over in his grave.

lotta guys out there robbing Peter for him

I understand that people want to get close as possible to the race car habitat for that perfect selfie, but somebody’s gonna get mauled by a driver one of these days.

For sure. If one thing gets people to open their wallets, it’s having a pigeon thrown at them.

They're just pigeons.