One obvious difference is that Trader Joe’s is a discount store while Whole Foods is colloquially called Whole Paycheck. With rising unemployment and diminished wages, it’s not surprising that the expensive store lags the discount store.

Um, Dannis... how could you mention pizza puffs (Iltaco’s greatest gift to mankind) and link to your cinematic masterpiece “Making Pizza Puffs at Home with Dannis Ree”?

This is how the zombie apocalypse begins. Fast food recycling during a pandemic, starting in flu season. Braiiiiiiiinzzzzzzz

Now they’ll have to live with the downmarket Sonoma cabbage version.

Vegetarians always trying to ruin the fun by taking out the meat. And it’s not even real meat - it’s Taco Bell Meat! The number of animals harmed in the making of the black bean version is probably higher than the number of animals harmed in the “meat” version.

See, this was sidling up to the kind of content I expected when they hired Dannis (and shout outs to my homie Davida and my sure-to-be-internet-friend-soon Lillian) but it wasn’t quite disturbing enough.

I told Dannis about this, Allison, but your prayers have been answered! Introducing... McBroken! A guy with way too much time on his hands and a similar distrust of McDonald’s ability to provide tasty frozen concoctions, he reverse engineered the McDonald’s mobile ordering API and sends out a “buy a McSundae” request…

“Count me a fan” - someone’s been reading @lowslowbbq...

The embedded Gizmodo ad in the story is for vibrator testing. He might need one of those to get his colon moving again...

Science educator Steve Mould had a video on this as well that isn’t quite as disturbing (and he has a very calming English voice):

It’s my favorite kind of porn

That was my thought too 👍

It’s not a higher source (about 0.4% calcium is the most common figure) but it’s definitely a sufficient source - for cows. Cows eat a lot of grass and they are pretty good at extracting calcium from that grass. One estimate I read stated they can extract about 100g of calcium per day (my own back of the envelope…

Undoubtedly - I will probably never see another working McFlurry machine in my life.

I don’t think I’ve ever eaten a mid-day McFlurry - it would only be dinner or as an after dinner treat, so I should be hitting the “McFlurry machine is broken” prime time.

Let the squirrels and chipmunks do it. Think of it as abstract art.

What’s super weird about this is that although this appears to be a common complaint (I read your Twitter feed, Allison), I have never once experienced it. Maybe I just go to well-capitalized franchises that can afford to have their machines serviced on the regular, but I’ve never seen a broken McFlurry machine.

It’s always Portland

So I think we can all agree, then, that it should be “almond milk food.” 😀

Like everything, moderation is key. But you specifically said “milk is not a good source of calcium” and went on an anti-dairy tear, which is wrong.