I hate square watches.

Not everyone uses a iPhone. I’m a MacBook Pro user but I can’t use an iPhone and be restricted in their ecosystem. I also don’t like the OS.

Oddly appropriate username

While 183 arrests have been made in connection with fires, only 24 people have actually been charged with arson.

Hoverboards

This is easy. It’s called “I don’t give a shit about my belongings and I can afford not to.”

I’m guessing agriculture will be one of the first sectors that is negatively affected by global warming.  Kind of ironic, given they don’t believe in it. 

You are under no obligation to provide any information about anyone (including yourself) to anyone except the police, and even then their authority is limited to asking your name, unless they have a warrant.  Don’t all cell phones give you the option of blocking calls from specific numbers?  After a single call from a…

+1
Google Cloud is one of my backups from my storage at home. I will never trust a cloud service as my primary backup after the bitcasa scam from a few years ago

Relativity says condensed to a point, down below the tiniest thing you can imagine with positive volume. Without a quantum understanding of gravity everything goes fuzzy.

At this point pretty sure there would be enough asteroid deniers that would pop up to mess it up. You can’t even see it or it is just a shiny star, astronomers are just putting a picture of a rock at the end of their telescopes to scare us, idiotic shit like that. I have very little faith left in humanity.

I think when my iPad and iPhone both wake up to “hey siri”, one says, “oh the other guy has it” and shuts off.

I would instantly and forever populate my home with additional Google products if this could be resolved. My most recent complaint: “Hey Google, play music”. And I get the same song from my phone and my home mini off by about 3/4 of a second. 

“They were talking to me!”

Yes this! You would think there would be some sort of agreement between devices about which should respond. Even better is when you make a request with a google home sitting right next to you, and for some reason the reply comes as a muffled distant voice from another google home in a completely different room!

What do they do now? The puff machine is easily the worst part (and most dreaded) of any optometrist visit.

Total deal breaker for me. Thats how we track all our spending. 

Electron neutrino: Honey, does it look I have gained weight?

But...it’s not $5/month.

It’s $5/month plus you have to be totally in Apple’s hardware and software ecosystem. That’s a greater investment than...literally any other streaming platform, which I can watch anywhere, on any device. So it would be more precise for me to say, it doesn’t matter to me whether Apple+ is good…

If they had just stuck the the original idea of “sending dildos to the places” this would be an entirely different story. Often the first ideas are the best ideas.