“The Saturday Night Live alum, who most recently starred in Adam Sandler’s The Ridiculous 6 and Joe Dirt 2: Beautiful Loser...”

My cousin has been shown being arrested on local news twice this year which means he too has been on tv more than David Spade.

I’m not an addiction expert, but Scheana’s insistence that Shay not take painkillers, but keep on drinking because she cannot be with a sober person makes me very worried about Shay.

I felt that way about Ariana in the beginning but as more and more Tom time passes I’m “meh” heading towards “feh”.

The eyes. She has Ramona eyes.

Tinky Winky, Po and Dipsy also star with her

I was really digging Lala for a while there. She’s funny as hell, and she might actually be the smartest person who works at SUR. BUT then she went on Watch What Happens Live and it was SO MESSY, y’all.

“Look employee, I’m not saying you should be beaten with toxic stingray tails but I am going to have to give you a write up for a no call no show.”

As an actual Sri Lankan whose social media has been blowing up with this - trust me, he’s unfortunately not alone on this. We are a deeply conservative and patriarchal country. This kind of “outrage” is par for the course.

“I don’t advocate that these uncivilized women who removed their brassieres should be beaten with toxic stingray tails, but those who organised such an event should be.”

Not worth the fight with my mom. Fantasizing passive aggressive comments to make.

Oh that SUCKS. It’s awful being the chill, non-demanding one, isn’t it? We’re the ones who get backburnered evvvvvery time. :\

I got the best Christmas present, this year! Last April, I became friends with a woman I met at my local yoga studio. I fell in love with her over the summer. But she’s straight, and so I resigned myself to the tragedy of unrequited love. For months, I kept my feelings to myself. Two weeks ago, she told me that she’s…

Being shamed for your diet while pregnant is awful.

I posted a couple of weeks ago that I thought my boyfriend was buying an engagement ring. Well, I was right!

After getting blown off by my BFF yesterday (she promised to spend Xmas day with me - her idea - then called to say her family was coming over, and she didn’t invite me), she said she’d call me today.

I still have half a key lime pie in my fridge, since Christmas was just me and my folks. (I don’t care if key lime pie doesn’t seem seasonal, this is when key limes are in season!) I should eat it all right now, y/n?

Is it okay to give one of your gifts to someone else? Like a purse because you don’t carry purses?

I got a design-your-own vinyl Stormtrooper helmet! AND ice cube molds in the shape of skulls, which are fucking BAD ASS.

I am SO happy right now! For the past couple of days I have been working (with my sister and brother in law’s help) on secretly doing some home improvements at my brother and sister in law’s house while they were away visiting her family.