Could have been worse. Remember the last black kid disciplined for looking at a white girl?

Oh I firmly believe Bush had a paid shoe-tie-er on staff. Either that, or Laura’s life is even worse than I imagined.

Seriously. It’s on the list right next to “alive,” “can tie own shoes,” and “probably not a murderer.”

Welp, glad to know that I am safe:

Well, of course I do. I am An Internet Person, and as everyone knows, the opinion of An Internet Person is the best one.

I care about clarity AND feelings.

My wedding was cool enough to get crashed without advertising.

Torrid’s thigh highs have always stayed up well on me! Also, if you’re not a fan of garters, it helps I think to use this body glue.

Torrid’s thigh highs have always stayed up well on me! Also, if you’re not a fan of garters, it helps I think to use …

IT IS THE FISH EGGS OF SEA GLASS

Ha, I didn’t even catch that.

But if I remove sharp glass today aren’t I destroying the future sea-glass industry?

The tide will turn on Becky soon.

The Royal Gazette reports that Fox “told the Erie Times-News that she visited the island in January after being invited by a local sea glass collector and left with two suitcases filled with glass to make jewelry to sell.” To add insult to injury, she also referred to the Bermuda beach as “a dump” in an online video.

Becky sounds like a real Glasshole.

Lol. No nothing like that, my parents have always been financially helpful and I have zero student debt. I cannot complain. I just worry about what motivates them sometimes.

I would like to be your parents dog.

I was talking to my Dad one day and he point blank says “We’re looking at houses in Florida to buy for the winter because I’m worried it’s too cold for the dog to go outside here.”

Was it, like, they were lying even though everyone knew it was for their dog (I.e. “We feel like getting a vacation home for us...yeah. For us. To be warm. Not the dog.”), or were they straight-up like “Yeah we’re looking at places in Florida for the dog” ?

I talked them out of it. But yes. They were going to.

Considering my parents were going to buy a winter vacation house for their dog when she got older because it as be too cold for her to go for walks outside ... this dog is cheap.