People have been brainwashed by the corporate big box strategy of loss leaders to believe that everyone practically gives away products to get you hooked.

Somebody’s bitter that their family failed at scamming for a free dinner.

That sounds horribly bland.

Can you do a Groupons Make Monsters segment some time? I have several horror stories from that theme.

It probably had visible wires from battery to click face. That’s the only thing I can think of that is “like a movie bomb.”

Nope, but I’m pretty sure we were drunk enough to do it for him.

I failed to make it salty enough to read as clear sarcasm, my apologies as well.

That’s because Harry Potter fans believe in fighting evil and righting wrongs. Twilight fans believe in stalking, seducing, and impregnating suicidal teenagers.

Can your lead singer be named Tiffany GlitteRazor?

So wait, you actually like Skyline Chili then? Wut?

See above comments involving sarcasm and raccoons. =P

It’s cinnamon chili. Made of raccoon anus.

(-_-)
I forgot that sarcasm doesn’t translate well on the internet.

ThirdAmendmentMan clearly hates delicious. He insulted Skyline Chili for god’s sake, can you trust his opinion about anything after that?

Taking food dares is another popular form of “too drunk” that is highly underrated. Nothing says bombed like a garlic mushroom chocolate cherry sundae pizza.

On her last night, one waitress grabbed some brandy that we used for saganaki on her way back out to the table with their re-heated food. She threw it down, lit it on fire, and said “Is it hot enough now?”

A couple of friends and I went to the Parthenon in Chicago’s Greek Town during a slow afternoon back in the late 90’s and the waiter willingly set a number of our non-saganaki dishes on fire with brandy for extra tips. We got chased out by the owner who complained we were scorching his ceiling.

I would assume it’s basically everyone with more than 5 friends.

You’re missing out. It’s the richest, creamiest garlic bread you’ve ever had.

Is that the restaurant equivalent of the “if there’s no price tag it must be free haha” joke?