If I want to get engaged to a guy that sees sex workers on the side, I’ll totally make this pasta. (A lady I know used to be in that line of work and he was one of her clients.)

if I had to guess, I’d bet its too contemporary. .... in being too retro.

I mean, while they may be classy and all (I kinda want to try them out TBH) they aren’t conformist, and I’d imagine that being TOO individualistic when you are just starting at a place like that, might seem too upstart-y and self important.

I…

Goats are so freaking adorable. Every year for Christmas Mr. Dog gives me the ‘Goats in Trees’ calendar so I have pictures of happy climbing goats to cheer up my office.

You know, the way you worded that makes me realize that I have several male friends, and not one of them has ever told me to smile. It is always strangers or near-strangers (like a coworker's douchy husband).

Imma need Giorgio Avola to explain it to me.

I suppose when you are desperate logic has no place. Which I can see.

This just happened to me. I was walking to my office and two men just said to me “why the frown? You should smile more.”

Slightly OT, but what is it with adults asking for hugs? Why is this a thing? In my experience, only men have asked me for hugs and in professional settings. Once a male coworker and I were chatting and he asked for a hug when the conversation ended. I said absolutely not. WTF. You are not my child, my parent, my…

Trying to pick a favorite from Trump’s crew is like on Red Letter Media when they do Best of the Worst and have three gawdawful movies and somehow have to choose.

Ugh I can't stand that Kaylie woman.

I want to see her chained under Sheldon Adelson's desk for life.

Wait a second, “hipsters” LOVE obscure, less mainstream bagel flavors. These people are the opposite of hipsters, they are sheep.

I’ve seen this particular Trump surrogate on multiple news programs and I just can’t with her. She’s disrespectful and condescending (well, most of them are). I usually have to mute or fast forward when she’s talking. She literally adds nothing to the conversation.

Those co-workers can go to hell! I bet they prefer plain bagels because they are afraid of flavor. Stupid jerks!

Huh? Pump bagel with some scallion or herb cream cheese, best shit in the world. Don’t let the idiots in the world who think that a “sub roll” is the best kind of bread dissuade you from the Truth that you’re already aware of.

Kelly, this story is woefully incomplete. You left out the part where, after inheriting the Dukedom and his fortune, he realizes that no woman can ever truly love him for him, and so resigns himself to a loveless marriage with a young miss straight out of the schoolroom at Almack’s. However, after an invitation to a…

I was like 8 months pregnant when I got to meet Hari Kondabolu after a show. I told him that I’d laughed so hard that I thought I might have pulled something (which was true, my abs were already pretty beleaguered because, 6 lb fetus). I meant it as a compliment. He immediately became very concerned. So I tried to…

Ain’t nothin’ wrong with that.

Ummm....you forgot fried chicken breast as a viable sandwich bread...

I do the same thing.