It’s embarrassing when it snows and we get just over a dusting and my wife tells everyone we got 8”.

That kid has a serious drinking problem. He needs to get sober before he gets himself killed.

Okay. Wisconsin. Your football team isn’t that great.

Why wouldn’t you just say Northwestern? Your football team looks really good this year.

I don’t understand why the cops weren’t called after the first shove.

But...but...it has to be served on Subway bread. And there’s something wrong with that bread, man. Something very wrong.

It’s Ewan McGregor in Big Fish.

I didn’t watch the whole thing. At what point does Bayless suck his dick?

Either that or he died...

This was about 30 years ago:

Cubs. None more deserving.

As far as the creep label goes, a few years ago, I was in NY on business. There were a bunch of us up there for fashion week. We had all gone to a little bar somewhere in Manhattan. It was my turn to buy beer so I walked down to the bar, got the six beers and was carrying them up on a tray. As I walked up the stairs,…

and oddly enough, 65% of their audience is over 85...weird.

That’s not the National Zoo’s panda. It belongs to China and they have to rent it.

“...because for that reason.”

This is fun. While watching, just randomly click anywhere on the timeline. Unless you accidentally get Pawl, you get Tammy and it all fits together perfectly. go from :20 to 1:34 to 6:12 back to 4:39. Her tone and inflection is always exactly the same. She starts at 100 and, man, she just stays there.

About 40 seconds in, I became aware of his breathing , his intake of air in particular. Then that was all I could hear. Did he say anything after that?

I was 10. I was in line for the Matterhorn Bobsleds at Disneyland. I had to go. I didn’t want to lose my place in line. I tried to hold it. I couldn’t. My dad was mad and took me to the restroom to clean up. I lost my place in line.

Here’s another: If there are other white people there, do NOT hang out with them without black people also joining. There is nothing more awkward than when you realize all the white people are hanging out together, separate from the blacks.