Because you have to capitalize “Boy.” That’s how it works.

Ummmm I had this baby beat. At an even younger age. It’s been said I resembled a monchichi.

Better a baby with a full head of hair than a baby with a full back of hair?

Yeah well I can roll off the couch and make it to the bathroom while intoxicated. Ppssshh.

I love the way she keeps glacing at the audience and anticipating when they’ll applaud.

Probably because she agreed to do the show so she could text all her friends and family that she's on the show and put it on Facebook and Instagram. But now she has to tell people not to watch, which is tragic, because instead of having 2 days about her and her dress she just has one, and she has to hope they have…

Actually, it’s your bias showing. Americans are so hung up on sex that it’s all they can see when two people spend time together. European (and other) countries that let women go bare-breasted on beaches or allow nudity on TV without the ZOMG boobies!!! crowd losing their minds do not have the issues that we have…

Blackout curtains might transmit infrared light. Since FLIR cameras are pretty cheap these days, he might be paranoid about somebody filming him that way. It sounds paranoid, but it could be very easy to see someone having sex. At the very least, you’d be able to tell the gender of the participants, which is what he…

THIS. It happens. Some teenagers are precocious and don’t relate to people in their age group as well as they do to older people. When I was 16 I dated a 22 year old guy for a little while. I enjoyed it and he was respectful of my physical boundaries. I didn’t suffer any damage. BUT - looking back, do I think he was…

Right, this could be solved by telling her fiancée to avoid watching the episode, therefore he wouldn’t see her dress or potentially jinx their entire marriage.

She was probably too busy scheduling the fourth rehearsal of the wedding party’s totally spontaneous down-the-aisle dance.

Spoiler: it’s also strapless.

WAY TO RUIN IT EVEN BEFORE THE EPISODE AIRS

Dear Bride,

She is dating a 24 year old who looks like he is 12. And is wearing a scarf that I’m pretty sure my childhood Barbie had but in purple.

Well he isn’t being catcalled by a 6'5 400lbs of muscle man named Cletus.

tin foil is to keep Xeny outside his head.

Almost all hotels (certainly Travolta caliber hotels) have black out curtains. What is the point of the foil, to keep the room fresh?

As a physician with several friends who know and have worked with this guy, let me just say that the entire emergency medicine community is at a total loss. This guy was top 3 in terms of powerful/influential EM docs. Truly staggering.

If Sumner was non-responsive to any kind of communication, he was being sexually assaulted.