Trump is not yet the worst American President. He has a lot more property to destroy or steal and a lot more people to casually imprison and kill before he gets that title.

Greatest Hope #2: Everyone has to leave Puerto Rico because Trump can’t fix the island and they all go to Florida and finaly make it blue once and for all.

The pols are grossly incompetent, spend the money foolishly or corruptly, & only take from USA....

And you see that same sentiment reflected in his response to Anita Hill’s mistreatment at his committee’s hands. “I did everything I could. They were mean to her. I couldn’t gavel them down. She should have been treated better but it’s okay because I voted against Clarence Thomas. Things didn’t turn out great, but I’m…

This is exhausting. There has been photographic evidence of this weird shit for years. Nothing could be more obvious, and yet he is going to make us all go through with hearing how it is FINE and women just need to toughen up or whatever is going to be said about someone you don’t know pulling bizarre moves like this.…

Oh, and the part where you hired Robert Mueller and got black people to pull for the FBI? That was genius.

You will learn to live off the cold, hard concrete. Eternally broken and sore, you shall wear holes in your shoes in search of the foods once so close to home now no longer within reach. Day after day, hour after hour, you will trudge forth into wind and rain, snow and hail to find and sate your hungry maw. Forever…

Ahem.

Artisanal Firewood.

What we need is more civility.

“can have allowance now?” lol

You deserve it Melanie!

If you’re right, it’s not exactly spaghetti harvesting!

70% certainty is far too low.

Donald and Melania could not talk or talk forever and still find things to not talk about.

Being related to a man who shares many behavioral traits with That Asshole, I’m 70% certain that “conversation” in this case involves him sitting at the table bloviating about “issues of the day” for hours on end while she is obliged to tell him how right he is about that thing. Probably while chewing with his mouth…

The Look is the worst. It can wither plants from a distance of 20 feet.

If you were hoping to find the Queen, look in the mirror. It’s you...you are Royalty with that story.

My friend’s cousin is a producer on the show. She’s been uploading behind the scenes photos all week from every season and its been giving me the biggest FOMO of my life - granted I work in accounting and not comedy.

I have big bras, both in cup and in band size and have been turning them around for 25 years.  Not a single instance of rug burn in all that time.

Just a quick fact check: You’re wrong.