Anne Lamott told a story similar to that in her fabulous book Operating Instructions. Her baby was colicky, and she was so fucking wiped and exhausted that when he actually slept she panicked, thinking something was wrong, that he was having a seizure or dead.

I loooove data, so I did this too (but longhand or using Excel usually—we only just got our first smartphones a couple months ago). It's okay. My big thing was sleep because (I found out) I am a monster when even slightly sleep-deprived. I printed out sheets for other caregivers to fill out regarding naps so I could…

I totally get this. I never experienced this myself, but I can absolutely see why someone would get super-focused on the things they actually can control. Because ain't no other control with a newborn...

EVERYTHING MUST MATCH AND NARY A WIRE HANGER IN SIGHT.

Oh my god, 11 months later and I am constantly dizzy and everything is fuzzy. ALL THE TIME. I've forgotten what feeling normal is like...

"Back then."

Paula Deen is a vampire who had her first heyday back when slavery was legal.

People who genuinely say "she's from a different time" are either

1. Terrible at math.
2. Think Paula Deen is super super old.
3. Racism apologists

PICK ONE!

Paula Deen was born in 1947. Civil Rights Movement, 1955 - 1968. She was…

"Look, Scalito - if you're going to infringe on voting rights, could you at least not infringe on my personal space? Or do you intend to eminient domain that as well?"

They (and lots and lots of other people) seem to think the only “real racists” are the most extreme and violent examples of racists.

Self-identified Nazis and Klan members? “Racist, obviously!” reply the Deens.

Loving wife, mother, and grandmother who romanticizes the antebellum South and drops ‘the n-word’ regularly?…

YOU GUYS!! My 21yo son has been in boot camp (Navy) for last seven long weeks and if everything goes well with his final test (which it will) I will be seeing him at graduation in 8 days. EIGHT.

Awesome. Those guys with big dogs look like they're being assaulted by an angry pony.

Big dogs FOREVER!!!!! :)

Cue the cat videos:

Fuck, I did not want to deal with heavy sweet stuff this morning. On the other hand, meet Fred. Picked him up from a rescue on Friday.

Aw, we have an English Mastiff. If he jumped on me like that, I would be seriously injured. He is the sweetest, and biggest, dog.

Guhhhhhhhh as a military wife with two dogs and an upcoming deployment this just. I just can't. Can. Not. With. This. :-{

dogs are the best. I'm not sure why the rest of the world exists.

As a latina, the fact that the show's hispanic leads are all maids doesn't bother me. It would be awesome to have more shows featuring leading latinas in more white-collar professions, but there's no shame in admitting that many of us do work as domestics and a maid's story is just as worthy of telling as a doctor's…

It is the only way to recognize a female person, amirite????

I know! I lost count at two!