In contrast to many others here, let me just say that my three-year old twins, who I love greatly, are generally pretty stupid and still enjoy looking at and touching poop if the opportunity presents itself (which it does with shocking regularity).

Unfortunately, the way this case is being handled makes it look like sex trafficking is a workers are legitimate business human beings.

So many prosthetic penises (penii?) in my past... When will I learn?

You ladies just need to meet a real man like my boyfriend, Vincent Adultman.

That’s just a typical Wednesday for me

Yeah, I can’t count the number of times I fell for it. Fool me once.....

Just last night in fact. The only downside is I’m allergic to wool, so you have to pull the acrylic over my eyes.

This is almost certainly a Randy Quaid inspired character..

oh man, this is such an awful story - how can anyone see this as anything BUT rape - but your comment made me laugh.

It's a tale as old as time.

More than I care to think about really

Ah, catfishing. Starts out as a lark, something fun to do while you’re bored, and then next thing you know you’re in England wearing a wool hat and a strap-on.

Two years ago, Stanley converted to Islam

This could spell disaster for the youngest, most vulnerable snowflakes. How will they survive in diapertypical diapers?!

Yea I’m surprised he didn’t throw “coitus” and “moist” in there too. Just to up that sexaaaay factor.

“She a big girl dog, yeah I’m putting in, I’m penetrating, I’m getting big, yeah I’m stimulated.”

oh i had no idea they were dating

For what it’s worth, these douchebros made a sign that sounds like they want to call the father’s “Daddy,” not that they want the daughters to call them Daddy.

This whole thing makes me love him even more (actually, I didn’t even love him before, but now I do). I can’t wait until you guys meet in person and it turns out like a terrible/great romantic comedy, in which you hated him and he drove you crazy in a bad way, and then it turned into driving you crazy in a good way,…

“Grandma I drew you this lion picture to cheer you up.”