I had only been in SF for a couple of weeks at this point, so I was really taken aback. I decided that if all guys were like that here, I'd start investing in quality vibrators.

I met him in the Mission, and I lived near Balboa Park at the time.

I've read most of the stories people have posted. This is the best one hands down.

Thanks for being so honest about it. Sexual attraction is weird thing. It doesn't really align with society's conventional views of "normality" or "civility" or "progress." It's deeply biological.

I think we're all cave men/women deep…

The funniest part was that a nickname a few other guys at work had given him was "not-so-slim shady" since he'd gotten kinda doughy of late. He was the type who wore oversized tee-shirts with cut off armholes. He was failing out of community college. The yinzerness was just the cherry on the sundae of a stereotype.

I gotta be honest, I'm kind of embarrassed that you call it a "blowie."

I fucked the groundskeeper in the garden shed of the church next door to my house. He was hot in a Vincent D'Onofrio Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead kind of way. He was 6'4" and muscular but a little soft around the middle, with a hairy butt and a girthsome dick. He had thick hair and long eyelashes. He bent me…

I can't unsee the image in my mind of zebra print bedding. I find that part of the story to be more horrifying.

giiiirl! Can we talk? You have exceptionally bad taste in men but thanks for sharing.

So I was 18 and a virgin and over the summer I had been hooking up with one of the maintenance guys at the camp I was a counselor at. So one time we go back to his parents house and watch a movie. We wind up fooling around and he starts to finger me. Now this wasn't the first time I had done this with someone, but I…

One of mine had a full-length portrait of Marilyn Manson circa Mechanical Animals on his forearm. Was quite surreal watching him jack off with that arm. :|

We went to highschool together. The first time we ever boned, he was counting, out loud. It wasnt until he gasped out "...three!..." that I realised he was counting at all. When he got to "....six!...." he came. He was counting the thrusts....out loud. He's still known as "Thrusty" to my friends. He went a bit cray…

A self-described "Nomadic Poet and Petition Signature Getter" I met at an Open Mic was invited over to my place after an impromptu date. Drinks and laughs were had. Making out like a couple of teenagers on the BART was fun.

One of my exes, hands down.

He didn't know what doggy style was. I turned over and he actually said the words "I don't know what you expect me to do".

Post soul-crushing breakup, I briefly went out with a bald wannabe white rapper with a "home recording studio" in his closet and zebra print bedding. What's worse is that he was, well, a bit overweight and if he was on top when we had sex, not only would I feel like I was being crushed under his weight, but he would…

haha, what's worse is that his hair wasn't blue because he was alternative! It's because his giant head of hair was turning gray and he thought that looking like a troll doll from the forehead up was a better look.

I was just glad that I didn't wake up with a gem in my belly button.

the guy who worked at an electronics store. His name was Eric Johnson but went by Lance at work. He said there was another Eric there and they couldn't have two, so he chose Lance. Lance Johnson. My friends and I referred to him as Penis Penis.

This guy from plenty of fish who was so ridiculously hairy, like a full vest. Except for his public region which was shaved clean. We had sex in my grandma's house where I lived at the time.

I lost my virginity to a guy who lived on my dorm floor. He had bright blue troll doll hair and was pale as a ghost. His dorm room smelled like stinky feet. It was the worst. When I see people from college, "the troll" comes up at least once.