Yup. It is truly insane to me how these people get through their day without falling down manholes or wandering in front of a bus.

No, we're set up for that. It's just people who are literally too lazy to read what's already in front of their eyeballs.

I TOTALLY SHOULD.

"My grandson is going to love this!"

Underpaid freelance writers who get paid to write totally bogus reviews for places they have never even heard of. Most of the Amazon book reviews are the same.

Yes, if two eggs are fertilized at the same time (this is how you end up with fraternal twins) and one splits into two embryos (the way you end up with an identical twin) you will have a set of identical twins and a sibling who just happens to have been born at the same time.

It does seem they encourage it, but I still don't understand why.

And "I'm allergic to crunchy. But not crispy."

OH MY GOOOOODDDD THIS IS MY DREAM RESTAURANT. If I had a nickle for every idiot who said "I'm looking at your menu online, can you read it to me?" I could build a nickle mountain and ski down it, laughing with insane glee.

Doppelbangers.

I knew identical triplets growing up. They had one older brother. I always felt for their parents; "Okay, we want two kids! Time for the second one" and BAM you hear God laughing.

This has to be peak narcissism.

I don't always take advice, but when I do it's from unemployed losers who write 500 words about their apps and service last night...

When I was little, I was so convinced it would be awesome to be an identical multiple (triplets on up, really). I blame it on those Quints toys.

That ain't even right... But it's how I feel about Benedict and Sophie.

What sort of insult is "monogrammed coffee mug guys"? Not trying to be a dick, just seems random.

Q. (He hung up, he didn't like the specials)

Yep. My husband brings home the best stories from his job. He works at a fancy resort restaurant in Marin County California and all kinds of douche happens there. It is always the "normal" people who are the jerks. They had an entire crowd of A-listers for a birthday party once (and I do mean A-listers) and they…

"And here is our garden."