“Siri, when can we use nuclear weapons?”

Part of being smart is knowing what you don’t know. He has no intellectual curiousity, none.

It’s a mark of intelligence to recognize what you don’t know and seek counsel and knowledge about it. Only stupid people think they know everything.

I’m surprised you spelled most of those words correctly.

I think we can rule out Derrick as a suspect if you just review his shooting percentage

I could tell you some stories...

Sue Storm can be a real dick after she’s had a few.

I am a Mets fan and I am amazed we made it this far with all the injuries they have had.

Cannot unsee this. Why did you ruin Mr Met for all of us?

Sadly, he had no idea what to do when he reached third base

Finally our reefs are safe and healthy

If there is anything better in life than a three-run walk-off homer in the eleventh inning when your broken-down, half-a-team is fighting like hell to stay in it, I haven’t experienced it yet. #lgm

Hell, that motherfucker got taken to Burger King before being locked up.

As a South Carolina resident, this is incredibly frustrating. Dylann Roof did not lose any of his rights as a citizen after he was charged with killing 9 parishioners at a black church. He’s just as much of a (suspected) domestic terrorist as Rahami.

Cowboy abuses Redskin woman.

I’m more than a decade removed from college. I have a good career and a great home life, but I sometimes worry that as the former editor of an award-winning student newspaper, I peaked in college.

Looking back on that time, and that previous sentence, the answer is really fucking clear. I’ll never be as important as I…

+1 Trail of Tears

Oklahoma was literally founded on the idea that you should be able to just take things away from Native Americans if you want it bad enough so I am not surprised.

Impressively, he covered more of the field on that run than the Rams’ RBs have gained all game.

My brother and nephew are autistic, we didn’t know about my brother until he was in his late teens and my nephew was starting to exhibit the early signs of autism. He had a very hard time as a child due to a lack awareness about the broad spectrum of autism. He and I were both given Ritalin back in the early 90’s I…