I went on “Win Ben Steins’ Money” because I was too intimidated to go on Jeopardy. I was like “Jeopardy? I’m no Ken Jennings!” My hat’s off to you, sir.
flubuk
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My favorite is “free oil changes with a new Chevy Bolt!”.
Fly into White Plains (HPN) when you can. Much nicer, small, quick in-and-out. Nearer to Manhattan than you think. JFK might as well be on Mars.
Costco checkout: “What’s that in your pants?”
I named my cat after Louis CK. Now I tell people I named him after Louis Armstrong.
I only follow people I respect, and mostly have met in the real world, on Twitter, so I never see all this negativity crap. It’s a wonderful experience for me. The only time I see this doucey crap is when someone I follows retweets (with comment, always) the President.
No terrorist could ever afford $100 bucks!
2026: Emperor Trump deports everyone with skin darker than a paper bag.
Are backup camera’s mandatory yet? Wasn’t that a compromise that they’d be on 80-something percent of cars by now?
Order the next table couple some drinks on you. Hint about if they drink them they’ll be in the mood for a 4-way. They’ll either leave or you’ll have a Penthouse letter to write about.
> The Bugsy screenwriter allegedly accosted women on the street, and tried to sway them by flashing his Directors Guild Of America card.
I have a 2015 Accord Hybrid. It’s awesome. Acceleration is great. Room is great. Looks so damn normal the cops don’t even see you (might be good for some of you out there!). If they’d just put a plug-in option on it, that’d be the better car, IMHO.
Headline: Lions eat Pruitt.
Someone’s compensating...
I swear this plus the rain is what made Microsoft so successful in Seattle. Cooler temps almost all year (about 2 weeks a year qualify in Seattle as “hot”), and rain 9 months of the year, keeping you indoors and “well, I might as well get some work done”.
Just haunt them with this image every day:
I’m having Ganymede Gin!