There will be a lot of naive tourists in New York jails soon, I guess.

She looks LOVELY! All the way down to her toes.

I was just being facetious :)

Is that totally fair to idiots? They aren't always racist.

Peggy I can't stop laughing.

Ugh, is Joe Simpson the creepiest guy on the planet, or just in the top 3?

Has Wesley Snipes been in jail for five years? I had no idea. And probably will forget all about it as soon as I click Publish.

I always think this when I hear something about a celebrity being a jerk. I understand that they signed up for this and really it's kind of a facet of their jobs, but I can also understand what it must be like to have people run up to you screaming "MARSHALL!!!!" or whatever, every goddamn day of your life. He can't…

Being seen in public with their parents?

You guys, this is awful. Truly awful. There is no reason in the world I need to see a LARGER version of the cartoony photos, especially not if it takes up so much screen space I can't see actual headlines. The comments section is a mess. It's too hard to get to things. You've really shit the bed here.

I also have been saying "hold on to your butts!" to myself for the past 20 years! I'm really glad I didn't read this before I saw the movie today or I would not have been able to not laugh out loud, and Jurassic Park must always be taken seriously. Just like nature, amirite barechested Jeff Goldblum?

What. The. Fuck.

That's a horrible story with a magnificent ending.

Ah well, at least she only duped you for 15 years and not 20. I would thank her for finally showing her true colors (is this really the first time?) and not wasting any more of my time. And I would not beat around the bush when people ask why we're not friends anymore.

(Disclaimer: I understand this comment doesn't address the point of the article, but I feel the size issue has already been thoroughly addressed by people more articulate than I.) Is upselling yourself on a dating profile really a thing? Isn't it easier to tell the blunt truth to a faceless stranger rather than having…

I just laughed out loud. And yes.

That Angelina Jolie picture is such a blatantly engineered photo op that it's sickening.

I'm also totally creeped out by the sexyface. Can either of them even drive?

To be fair, it's gotta be hard to be a sibling of Madonna's and ever feel successful at anything you ever did.

So....let them starve in the dumpster? That's way better.