If I posted pictures of myself nekked on the interwebs (Note: No) I certainly wouldn’t want my family members responding to it. Jesus, what at they, the fucking Lannisters?

I mean, I get why it would be hard to acknowledge somebody that I loved, trusted, and thought I knew would be this vile—I cannot even fathom finding this kind of thing out about my husband or father or even a friend.

^Footage of Diane Keaton’s PR person/agent at the moment.

When I dated, nearly every man I interacted with ignored a “no” from me at least once, and that had nothing to do with sex.

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie points out that when men say they’ve done something for peace in their marriage it’s something like not going to strip clubs during week nights, and when women say it they’re usually talking about a job, or a dream, or a career.

I actually LEARNED stuff from reading the American Girl Dolls catalog as a kid. I learned what bedwarmers and snoods and bathing costumes were, plus all the traditions associated with St. Lucia Day in Sweden!

I’ll admit, I was super into historical dolls as a kid. I read the American Girl Doll catalog with the attention of a Talmudic scholar, but it was too expensive for my family. My best friend got Samantha’s art kit, which included miniature tubes of oil paint, tiny paintbrushes, and some kind of wooden case. We…

It is amusing the crap out of me that my auto-play ad on this article is for Kraken Rum complete with the Kraken destroying a big ship.

Okay, I’m going to share a scary story— really more of a scary fact of my life, past, present, and future, than a single story— that only about eight people on the planet know fully about, one of which is no longer with us, making the grand total seven. And now you will know, too, random internet person! I’ve created…

Ok, here goes. Writing this out makes me want to barf. 

KENNY FOR BACHELOR!

I think Peter is really cute and actually seems like not a total dumbass.

God, Bryan is absolutely winning and I find him disgusting. Every time he interacts with her at all, it’s just oozing with sex, but in a sleazy, not hot, totally insincere way. He’ll be banging bottle girls behind Rachel’s back in a Fort Lauderdale club by October. Peter as Bachelor could be interesting.

Here’s one more.

I’d like to think “oh he did this because he’s stupid” but honestly I think he did this because 1: they’re fucking untouchable at this point and 2: his supporters don’t give a shit, they see nothing wrong with it. When Trump said that he could fucking shoot people and not lose any supporters, he meant it. Strap in,…

Today I felt like I breathed fresh air for the first time in nine months. My heart is soaring. I’m gonna get so blackout drunk when these fuckers are finally all indicted, it will probably put me in the hospital.

My ma adopted a shitzhu who was a baby machine for the first 7 years of her life. My mother is undiagnosed bipolar and focused all of her mania on this dog. Her demeanor and body language encouraged anxiety and neuroticism in the dog, which is expressed in aggressive and and nervous behaviour around other dogs and…

1) I am unable to keep up with rapper names and genuinely thought Ferrari in question was the Italian car maker, so trying to parse what I was reading was... Difficult at the beginning.

*stands on desk*

It seems like widowed fathers get remarried faster. I suspect this is the reason why.