Bruh. No one gave him smallpox.

In what way was he a selfish idiot? Because he didn’t illegally leaked trademarked property? Or because you didn’t find this disk and get all the freebies from Blizzard?

They took his home his kids and his land for worthless beads? No? Then you have no idea what you are talking about.

That’s pretty cool, win-win for both parties involved.

Oh, so in a year then.

Wouldn’t it be a shame if we reported an illegal immigrant who pretended to have a job to enter the country, but didn’t actually, married for a green card, then FINALLY got a largely ceremonial job, BUT refused to do it and cost taxpayers an inordinate amount of money because she refused to uphold the…

I’m going to call the hotline tonight, and report on actual “human” aliens and their crimes. You see, I grew up near the border of Canada. Those damn Canucks sneak across the border and steal (well buy, but in funny lookin’ currency) all the milk in my county. I’m not sure what’s up with the price of milk in Canada...…

I’m going to prank these guys weekly with the plot line of some sci-fi alien movie. First one up: SPECIES!

I wonder how many Apache fellas called the hotline number about those abusive white people taking their lands and infecting their people with diseases.

Thomas D. Homan. Thomas Dee Ho-man. Thomas The Human.

an ice cooler:

I cannot star this enough.

How is pranking these assholes hurting victims?

If I was American, I’d be calling to report that ICE was asking for my documents outside a courthouse.

Ice. Ice. Baby...

It’s pretty horrible that they’re dismissing people who have been kidnapped, probed, kept in zoos and forced to breed, all for the entertainment of a bunch of fucking intergalactic dolphins.

I need a moment to compose myself so I can give a proper response to this...

Right now it’s 5 squirrel pelts to one rabbit but the market is volatile and rates will most likely vary in your area. There is also a huge surplus in badger pelts. We don’t need no stinking badgers!

Right now it’s 5 squirrel pelts to one rabbit but the market is volatile and rates will most likely vary in your…

The bar is so low, I’m just glad they didn’t wear blackface in front of Michelle’s portrait.