Not important? NOT IMPORTANT??

You forgot:

I actually thought (2) was the real crux of the joke. As Rock was saying in the monologue about having bigger problems. The observation that people jump to complain about the characterization of Asians as good at math while ignoring that they are contributing to child labor is appropriate.

God you went straight to the bottom of the barrel, didn’t you? Haha. I couldn’t think of two more mediocre and useless “comedians.”

For a woman in comedy to be noticed she has to be exceptional. For a man? Dane Cook and Daniel Tosh would like a word with you.

You don’t have to start as mayor. You can start as a city council member and work your way up as most politicians do. People forget that all politics are local. Get in.the.damn.game.

A base guitar is like a regular guitar, except it can’t play acid rock.

It would be irresponsible not to speculate. This Washington Post editorial is a thing of beauty:

So, uh, this is about as awkward as Chris Christie standing behind The Drumpf at a political rally.

In a nutshell, this.

Glue for her arts and crafts projects?

Bernie is a wonderful guy and politician and none of this has been in vain; at the very least he’s given the party a hard yank back to the left.

Wolf Pack makes me think of American Ninja Warrior, because, seriously, there can only be one wolf pack....

Isaac Caldiero and his #AmericanNinjaWarrior boys are going to be upset Team Vape is biting their name, I think.

I wouldn’t pay for my children attend a university that allowed students to carry guns on campus. No way. The biggest danger with this policy isn’t mass shooter scenarios, it’s bitter break-up, bad grades, horrible roommate, sports rivalry, drunken shenanigans, etc.

If they ask you, “Mommy, why isn’t that lady wearing a shirt?” and you answer “Oh my God Tommy, close your eyes! Hurry! Don’t look!”

These motherfuckers.

Good. And, there are probably many more salons out there that need to compensate their workers retroactively.

no it’s the tux

My recommendations as a dude that travels a fair amount for work and for fun: