Boring persons kids like boring bullshit,shocking

My wife and I kept making the mistake of banging on valentine’s day so we have two kids each born within a week of christmas.

Naan and Nuun...got it. Plan to have them around noon.

do it on his half birthday in January. Right after New Year’s to MLK day, the parks clear out. After MLK it’s quiet again until President’s Day. That’s locals’ time and it’s the best. You could also try September, which is also pretty dead, but it will still be hot and may be hurricaning.

Pssst, there’s a legitimately great tequila bar in the Mexico showcase...

this is good kinja

well duh we’re going to be drinking our faces off but we can GO TO GERMANY OR FRANCE for the price of this trip

It is crazy to think what a Disney trip costs and where you could go in the world for the same amount of money. It ended up being about $5000 for me, my wife, and kid. We’ve been to Europe for much cheaper than that.

For the love of god please don’t spend almost six fucking grand taking your kids to an overpriced shit show. For that money you can take them abroad or to basically any country in the world. There are so many better things to do. Sure, kids love Frozen. But kids also love the Eiffel tower or swimming with dolphins in…

I was in the Magic Kingdom on July 4th a few years ago. It was a huge mistake. The crowds were ridiculous to the point where it was suffocating.

This is the strangest part about it for me. Why does this 60 year old man want to celebrate his birthday in Hell? He thinks the grandkids will love it and he’ll be “Worlds greatest grandpa!” but we’re all going to end up murdering each other.

Tell her he is a fucking adult, if you are going to Florida go to the beach. I have been to Disney once as an adult, I will never return to the state if I am not within 5 miles of the coast.

Answer to b) Sort of. It’s worth it, though.

You guys, I’m panicking.

You had me up til the last sentence. That just made you seem like an insufferable tool.

a) I lived 20 minutes from Great Adventure growing up but moved away before they implemented fast pass. I remember waiting 45+ minutes for a 30-second go at the water slides. Jeeeeeeesus.

So what have we learned ? Find some blonde haired college girl and pay her $100 bucks to dress up like Elsa and swing by your house to give your kid a hug and an ice cream cone at her 6th birthday party.

This....this is fucking ridiculous.

or, if you so love waiting in line, you can go to the DMV. it’s free and it’s air conditioned.

We adopted and had nine day notice that baby was on the way. They gave us a helpful list of the things you actually need in the first weeks, and honestly, if you get invited to a baby shower, stick to these. Diapers wipes and cream, burp towels, formula (because we adopted), bottles, a few sets of clothes, a few…