Obviously you’ve never gone through the application and screening process to adopt a dog from a breed-rescue organization, which only slightly less time consuming and comprehensive as the adoption application and screening processes for some human adoption organizations. Also, for some people, after the extremely high…

I’m sure the AKC or some rescue group or other has stats on this. They’d have to. I do know that pit/pit-like breeds are the MOST abandoned or most in-shelters due to (largely undeserved when raised right) bad reputation alone. But they are also terriers. Staffordshire TERRIER, Pit Bull TERRIER, Bull Terrier (aka…

naturally, i googled birthalingus. only one result came up: this page. congratulations you have invented a new word/kink. i will google again in one week by which time there ought to be many many thousands of results complete with appaling images. it’s a great time to be alive.

It’s Cat Stevens’ voice.

fuck the cat. worst piece ever.

“I’ll see if he can send me a pic...”

which player hits a dummy with the most impact

If you fill up a gas can with primo unleaded and then try to sell it a year later (without blowing yourself up in the interim), rest assured that a big siren goes off at Exxon’s volcano mountain lair, and the cat-stroking warlords in charge will stare at a GPS image of you on a very large screen.

“watching the Australian Rules Football ‘Grand Final’... ...at halftime, to my amazement, instead of some pop-music bullshit or whatever, they took the 10 fastest players from the other teams in the league, and had a 100-meter race, right there on the field, ...Are there any valid reasons why this should not happen in…

I don’t think it’s a fart. I think it’s a twanging string, like on a guitar.

If you don’t buy every single property you land on, you’re not playing Monopoly correctly anyway.

I always take the wheelbarrow. How else am I going to cart around all my money?

wait, what? that can’t be...

Why Roger Goodell Wasn’t Wrong When He Killed That Man.

“Tonight. You.”

There might not anything worse than going to buy some sort of pop culture on the day it’s released and being asked by the store clerk whether you pre-ordered or not. No. No I did not give you $5 two years ago to hold (interest free) so I can get my copy of the secret Harry Potter book on the same stupid day as…

One of my favorite It’s Always Sunny episodes:

Sample Peter King columns kept on file just in case:

Gilbert Arenas threatened to shoot his own teammate over (probably) a few grand in gambling debts. Kobe punched a teammate over $100. Do you not think that $5000 and bragging rights would not be enough motivation for Pacman Jones to shoot somebody during the 100-yard dash?