It’s all about Duran Duran, I don’t even know who half these other folks are.

that he’s considered calling in the military “to protect women and the country.”

Youre gonna want to pipe down on the Canada-brag, because if Trump gets elected, you're gonna end up with a lot of new neighbors.

I hope the counter-protester makes a new sign that says “this man is a registered sex offender” and stands next to that dude every chance he gets.

Yes, yes. But who is Rita Ora? Why is Rita Ora? Who is what why Rita Ora?

I just zone out and go back to reading this post because this shit is ludicrous and I can’t take it anymore.

Right? “I hate the Kardashians so I can have no sympathy for a grieving widow” is absolutely the most disgusting mindset to be proudly displayed during this media cycle.

I’mma try this next time something goes wrong: “the cat did it.”

I wasn’t allowed the cereal but was allowed the cookies and ice cream in moderation (ie maybe one of them a day, we never had more than one half gallon of ice cream and one carton of cookies and when we went to visit my dad’s brother for the weekend which was junk food capital of the world in my eyes we had to have no…

I wasn’t allowed to even look at sugary cereals as a kid. I do want to try that new cereal that’s basically a chocolate stuffed cookie. Krave? It looks like garbage and I want it.

We know. We just don’t care.

“By the time I look flat chested I’ll be too drunk to care?”

7th grade me had a BF who listened to P.O.D.

I was fired from McDonalds for telling someone to go fuck himself. He deserved it and I wish I had been as high as He-Man.

“It’s important to keep every workplace drug-free. You don’t want people on drugs running the fryer at McDonalds.”

Dads do hate speeders. I remember my dad running out the front door of our house that was on the main street of a smallish town, shaking his fist at a pickup truck that was speeding away and screaming “you asshole you oughta be shot!”

Anne Hathaway is pregnant! Isn’t that great? A source says she “wants to keep it quiet” until she “has an official pregnant belly,”