I assume the Suns will look to draft both De’Aaron Fox and Malik Monk in their ongoing quest to have an all-Calipari-guard starting five.

Oh, he’s definitely filled with #2 material.

They at least had the decency to fall apart early in the season without dashing anyone’s dreams, unlike the Gary Payton-Karl Malone “Super Team” the Pistons embarrassed.

Cheap shots and flops: the Spurs way.

Why, does somebody not know where the Celtics are from?

There’s a guy who’s totally unaware that his fifty-eight year feud with John Cena helped indy wrestling. Orton’s shitty matches made Daniel Bryan a star.

“Not enough magic refrigerators.”

“But, what if my reality show makes me rich?”

Russian people, American people, what’s the diff, really?

True. We don’t know just how much hotter Maya is than Peter.

That was far more instrumental in Phil Jackson winning his championships than the triangle offense ever was.

Let’s not leave the most important work to do after the cleanup of this national shit show to people who spent day in and day out working with Chris Benoit thinking, “Yep, dude’s fine! This is not at all an unsafe environment!”

That headline makes for an excellent suicide note anytime between now and the end of 2023.

“Now coming in at goalie, number 45, Kah Kolster!”

Nope. It’s a zany goofball hockey team captained by Harry Anderson.

Flopping in front of Ginobili has to be the basketball equivalent of the “I learned it from watching you!” PSA.

For a pro team in a state run by a cult, they do alright. The Jonestown basketball team never made it to the postseason.

The Washington John Wall hasn’t been eliminated yet! There’s still hope!

The Ol’ Tarheel Gimme.

I was about to say he’s slow to learn, but there are clearly slower learners working for the Bills.