I had a friend’s friend, who is a gay man, grab my crotch twice while a group of us went out clubbing one night. He thought because he was gay and we were all dancing that it was fair game to “dance fondle” me. I told him after he did it the second time if he tried it again I’d kick him in his face. He went to the bar…

Is it me or does that look like John Cusack in the poster?

Much too sexy. Needs Moir Virtue.

Has a plumb job. FIFY

Peter Gabriel is the other-worldly gift that keeps on giving.

Thanks. I guess my point was that friends do weird shit sometimes with no warning and they must think it’s ok to abandon ppl without any explanation. They don’t think how it makes the rest of us question everything.

Had my first kid a few months ago and became extremely busy/tired. I’m still writing damn thank you notes for baby gifts, and had texted one friend in particular a couple times over the last few months with no reply. She was at my shower. I needed her address for the thank you note and went on facebook to message her…

What did that person spend almost $1400 on at Target????

Had a code read at auto parts store that said to replace my MAF sensor (2012 Altima). Could I clean it instead of replacing?

He looks like my Scrapple:

Remember the old HBO commercials? “Yo hablo español! I’m bilateral!”

Time for a new doctor. I had one while pregnant, just make sure you get the kind without preservatives. So I had to get mine from my OBGYN instead of the one provided by my work’s wellness fair.

We have an 8.5 month old, who needed a bit of formula here and there from the beginning. I had mastitis which left one boob underproducing. That being said, me and my partner just naturally came to a swapping night schedule, since he had to get up at the buttcrack of dawn some mornings for work (430, 5am), I would…

The plastic is what’s kept my S4 mini going still. It’s like the Razor, I can throw it at the wall and the back comes off but nothing happens to the phone!

I’m still rocking my S4 Mini, so I hear ya! I hate there are no small options anymore, I have tiny hands, dammit!

This Laurie chick missed a huge pun opportunity by not saying “It’s GATTA go” instead...

This is Merrifield Town Center in nova!

I live near you (nova). I wish we were friends and our dogs could have a doggy play date! (imnotacreepiswear)

Not Major?

I have found out that when you want to post a photo you can’t just click the dropdown menu and select the photo upload button. Open the dropdown first, then click in the space below, like you were gonna type something first (you don’t have to actually type anything), THEN click the photo upload button and do your…