Worst game of Clue ever. The murderer was the Butler, in the bedroom, with the bedbugs (and subsequent neglect).

Did you know that if you don’t eat the pigs they might eat you?

I don’t approve of this but then again I saw her on the Match Game and she was ok there so now I’m confused again.

Also she is a pathological liar, which apparently is frowned upon by “feminists” and “people”.

And let’s not forget the Speaker of the House in The US of America: http://www.runnersworld.com/newswire/paul-ryan-has-not-run-sub-300-marathon

Mom: “I’m as surprised as anyone. As a teenager he showed potential, but ever since then things had really gone . . . downhill”

JoPa is evidence that the NCAA death penalty really works.

On Feb. 20, 2014, the athletic department informed Eustachy that he was no longer allowed to be alone with players, and that the AD or an associate AD must be present at practices, team meetings, and in the locker room during games.

Can we do an all Baylor fans/administrators to Diana version of this sometime?

Ah yes, the Pontiac Tiktaalik

Vengeance will be mine . . .

There is nothing worse than a young kid pooping in a tub. You can take them out of the water but the poop water is all over them. Then you try to clean the tub and the kid starts to run off to get poop water everywhere. So instead you towel off the kid but now you have the poop water on the towel. So then you carry…

Look at it this way: given that women make on average about 25% less than men, withholding 25% of revenue will mean they have to hire more women, right?

See, it’s not a choice to act like that. Bills fans were born that way.

Thanks for shearing this terrible pun.

I’m not afraid of seeing 2 men kissing. I just don’t want either of these 2 men to be happy, even if it’s with each other.

Russell: Per my contractual arrangement with Microsoft, I love both the Surface and my yet unborn child so much I will name him/her Clippy.

Aaron Hernandez chose both.

You forgot to mention the details Deadspin readers need: how many turds got dropped on that stage?