I’ll be killed off in June and replaced by Miles Teller

I DEMAND A RECOUNT. NO ONE PUTS GLOOM IN THE CORNER.

Bombshell? If this was foreshadowed any harder it would be a solar eclipse.

You’re right in this situation and yet my instinct would have been to swim too. I can see that the water is calm and free of obstacles on the surface. I might put my foot down, get it stuck in something, and then have the current push me face down. ‘They’ always tell you not to put your feet down if you come out of a…

This fails to account for how often survival instincts are stupid things that lead us towards making the wrong choice in a given scenario. ‘Stay in the shelter, it’s dangerous outside’ is a survival instinct. It just happened to the be the wrong one in this situation, but the guy couldn’t get past that until…

Even “honkies” has almost no effect. You really want to make white Americans experience what it feels like to be the victim of a stereotype based purely on the color of their skin, make a shirt with a white cartoon face that says “Racists”.

The only problem with the argument, and he’s not wrong btw, but the main issue is, there’s not anything you can call a white person that will be anywhere as offensive as any slur you can think of for any minority. Whether you think Indian or Redskin is bad or not, the only people getting offended by Jones’ shirt are…

A spokesman for ESPN says they’ve been flooded with calls from white people overjoyed to see a black man rooting for them.

But we already have one of those, right?

Scratchy: Ooh, [Drew Magary] is one outrageous dude.

Q-tips belong on that list too, generic cotton swabs suck more dick than Tom Brady

it is I, gay bias, here to be happy to have more options in a video game

Oh my goodness the American purples needs to elect him before they steal our MITOCHONDRIA

The one where Tom Brady is walking around with his hand up is when it really hit me

I don’t even own a WiiU, and watching these Mario Marker torture levels gives me anxiety attacks.

Why did you let this fool out of the greys? Please tell me they were in the greys.

ALL FEMALES CHEAT. That’s a FACT.

Referring to women as “females” definitely helps your credibility here...

Loving Squirrel Girl. I mean, I’ve loved pretty much everything Ryan North’s written, so it’s no surprise to me. But that Jubliee cameo doesn’t show my favorite part: