Oprah is a shameless opportunist and it is about time she was called out for it. She preys on society’s most vulnerable members and feeds them consumerist pablum as way to ‘fix’ their problems.

I’ve been a bit surprised by the reaction to Doctor Phil. Like, this was the final straw? When did people hear about Dr. Phil? Yesterday? He’s been a piece of shit for a long, long time. Whatever other gifts she has, Oprah has consistently shown herself to be a fairly poor judge of character.

Obligatory comment petitioning for revival of I Thee Dread.

The weird part is that Taylor Swift was auditioning for the role of Javert.

I really wish that Oprah had never brought Dr.’s Phil & Oz out of the grays.

So often pro-lifers present the issue as a choice between abortions and no abortions. It is not. It is a choice between safe, legal procedures and a fucking horrorshow of misery and desperation.

Sugary cocoa butter with milk solids doesn’t exactly have a good ring to it.

Jesus is this what it really looks like now? That’s bullshit. I’ll still eat it because it’s goddamn delicious but fuck this awkward looking chocolate bar. Pfft.

They couldn’t just make it shorter? They had to do this?

this is the real story here folks

“I’m so very sorry, but when we were stitching you up Dr. WTF sewed his finger to your labia. It didn’t worsen the tear, but fluids mixed and we do need to do an HIV test. After we re-sew.”

Fuck that doctor. The condom situation is so incredibly common.

not any more, no.

Okay so it’s not really “gross” and I probably told this story before, but it’s still hilarious to me.

I’m always grossed out when I hand over the sample... because it’s so warm. They feel that. It’s like picking up my dog’s poop with a bag... so warm. So fresh. So awkward.

in the not particularly gross but fairly embarrassing column: my doctor once told me i had the largest tonsils he’d ever seen, so i went up for a high five.

That I was lactating because of a brain growth and that I was not, in fact, pregnant at 15. I know lactation isn’t actually gross but it is when you’re a 15 year old virgin.

You get a tall glass of water for impact!

Not too gross but it changed me forever. Was in high school and doc needed a urine sample so I gave her one. She was like “Um. You really, really, need to drink more water.” It has stayed with me for years. The shame I felt about my dark yellow (orange?) pee instilled a love for water like the world has never seen.…