I thought it was intentional and kept looking for the punchline. But, ice cream.

Thank you! I try not to be a Grammar Nazi. I really do. But reading that headline was like being stabbed in the eye with an ice pick. Writers, if you’re going to write, please attempt to use at minimum, eighth-grade grammar. Otherwise, you have no gravitas. None. At all.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

So Lochte basically told the Cartman version of the story

BUT DID SHE HAVE A BROKEN FREAKIN’ NECK?!?!

Hey I can answer this! The skyball serve, while mostly a novelty, does (in theory) accomplish a few things.

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Did Bofa get signed though?

Probably about 60% of NBA conversations between me and my friend.

This is a great rundown of Andre’s drinking as well:

Whoa whoa whoa, I’m all for jingoism, but that’s a Fox Sports+Skip Bayless level lede right there. There’s ten other dudes on the pitch, yeah? Presumably paid a lot of money? Just as vested as Messi in whether the team wins or loses?

Not as good as Draymond.

“All I’m gonna do is write essays,” Jefferson said. “I don’t know what they’re going to be. They might be erotic. I don’t know. But I’m just going to write lots of essays.”

Can we please give Cleveland a few days before we have to deal with this bullshit again?

It is amazing that the dude just shut down Curry 1 on 1 during a clutch moment in the game, was +19, and had 14 rebounds and still getting shit on.

I dunno, I'm sure I've never sat down and really written out specific criteria. But, in my reckoning, what makes Ali special is that he not only had an in-ring career that is basically unrivaled in the history of his sport (in terms of the fighters he fought, the success he had against them, the way his boxing style…

"It's not deliverance, it's DiGiorno, baby!!!"